Mores

Mores Jokes

Internet

Does anyone still look at this? If you do, tell me if I should make more jokes :)

Autobiography

Me: Mom, should I kill the main character in the book I'm writing to make things more interesting?

Mom: Sure, honey! What type of book are you writing?

Me: It's an autobiography.

Stripes

The other day, me and my friend were at the shops buying crafts. I was wearing a black top; she was wearing a stripy top. We were arguing about who was more creative when she asked me to prove that I am. I just said, "You buy your stripes, I make mine."

Dog

My girlfriend's dog died, so I tried to cheer her up by getting her an identical one.

It just made her more upset. She screamed at me, "What am I supposed to do with two dead dogs?"

Doctor

A doctor walks up to a dying man and sadly says: "I'm sorry, the test shows you only have 10 more to live."

The man says "10!? 10 what!? Years? Weeks? Days? What?!!?"

The doctor calmly replies "Nine".

Money

What is the difference between giving money to a prostitute and giving money to a church? A prostitute won't tell you that it is more blessed to give than it is to receive.

Irony

It's ironic that the more other people love you, the more you hate yourself.

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  • Trash

    A man walks to the window and opens it and pulls out his phone and takes a photo. "One more picture and I'll jump." He takes another photo and shuts the window. "I can't jump, you're not supposed to throw trash out the window."

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  • Dead Baby

    How many dead babies does it take to change a light bulb?

    Must be more than 13, because my basement is still dark.

    Depression

    If you ever feel depressed, drink some coffee.

    Expresso, expresso, no more depresso!

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  • Car crash

    A boy and his mother survived a car crash.

    The boy asks his mother, "Was that like how I was born? A hard smash?" The mother replies with "More like an accident."

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  • Content

    Hey guys, I’m back, just wondering if anyone is still on this that wants me to make more.

    Monkey

    Today I learned humans eat more bananas than monkeys. -- I can't remember the last time I ate a monkey.

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