Morbid jokes

Morbid jokes

Violet

Roses are red, That much is true, But violets are purple, Not F***ing blue!

  • 7
  • Baby

    What goes 100mph and bounces up and down? A baby tied to the back of a truck.

  • 3
  • Toy

    if a toy from Toy Story died, the kid wouldn't know, and the other toys would just have to watch as their kid played with the corpse.

  • 6
  • Couch

    I like my couches like my women... Old, used, and big enough to fit 3 men.

  • 0
  • Body

    A woman went out on a date and said, “I’m thirty-one with the body of a sixteen-year-old.” The man responded, “Wanna show me? 😏” The woman took him back to her house and opened her freezer and said, “Take a look.”

    Girl

    In Saudi Arabia, our pick up lines are, "Girl, are you a terrorist? Cuz you da bomb."

  • 2
  • Grandad

    Roses are red, violets are violet.

    My grandad died in 9/11. He was a good pilot.

    Crowbar

    Sticks and stones may break my bones, but a crowbar could do it so much quicker.

    Murder

    Murder is the same as suicide, except the other person is doing it for you.

  • 3