What do you call a Terrorist in a whelk chair
Rcxd in bound
A man was taking a child into a dark forest. The child said, "I'm scared..." The man replied, "Well I have to walk home alone."
Alien vs Predator
Cosby vs E.T.
My Aunt visited and saw all of the stuff around the house my mom had kept over the years and said "If you have something that no one likes, and it only makes people upset, or its useless, throw it away." the next time my Aunt visited she said "Where is you daughter?" my Mom said "I took your advice"
What if little johnny was doing drugs? johnny johnny? yes papa? eating sugar? no papa...
Why is UK bad at chess? Because they already lost their queen.
German XP farms: Train carrying chained guys. American XP farms: Walking up to a school with a gun. African XP farms: Cotton field.
I seen a bus the other day with some boy scouts at the back, one of em was having fun getting his knot tying badge.
when the quiet kid gets angry and the sped kid sees your hiding spot. bing,bang,boom
What has hands but can’t clap?
A thalidomide baby.
Guy walks to his friends house his friend says “where is your girlfriend” guy says meet me at the cemetery in a week
kids
my departed uncle was a circus clown before he died
so all his friends came in one car
Women
Q:why was 10 afraid ? A:because he was always between 9/11
Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.
What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.
I went home to my girlfriend, with milk! She said, "Oh thank you honey!"
Then I got a call from a girl named Melissa. She called and said, "Steven, where the hell have you been? It's been two weeks and you still haven't come back yet?"
My ex died in an anchorage accident. She always was a sleeping hooker.
Why did Muhammad Ali go down because he couldn't stand the cancer
Grandpa said no phone near the table so I said your not allowed near the school
