Morbid jokes
Never invest in funerals. It's a dying industry.
A man tried to shoot Adolf Hitler, but missed. Then Adolf replied, "Oh shoot, I did nazi that coming!"
What's worse than a baby in a trash can?
A baby in 10 trash cans.
Well, I don't have a joke but... I have a poem.
My dick is red, your pussy is blue. I... lied to you.
What's about 12 inches long, has a purple head, and can make women scream all night?
Cot death.
Dark humor never gets old, just like children with cancer.
What did the little boy say to the fat man?
How many Japs did you get?
Girls are like blackjack; you shoot for 21, but I keep hitting 14.
What's red and bubbly and scratches at the microwave glass?
A baby in the microwave!
An apple a day, or you'll die anyway.
Wanna hear a joke? You.
Nurse: Don't worry, I'm great with babies. Parents: You are? Nurse: Yeah, I always abort them. Parent:... Parent: You're hired.
Why do you put a baby in a blender feet first?
So you can see the look on its face as you climax.
Man, my Muslim friend's the bomb!
pussi
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?
Gang rape.
So Stephen Hawking walked into a bar - just kidding.
I got a handjob from a blind woman the other day. She said, "It's the biggest thing I ever had in my hand." I said, "No love, you're just pulling my leg."
What do you call black people in pool?
Coco Pops.