Advertisement: What's in your wallet? Me: The same amount of money as there is my will to live... ;_)
What do you call a Chinese billionaire?
Cha Ching.
What did PETA say when a cheetah won 5 million dollars?
You cant beetah the cheetah
Women only call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
My gf left me for spending my own money I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute she leaves me
The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick
A man with a gun goes into a bank and demands for money.
Once he is given the money, he turns to a customer and asks, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "Yes sir, I did."
The robber shot him in the head, killing him instantly.
He then turned to a couple standing next to him and asked the man, "Did you see me rob this bank?"
The man replied, "No sir, I didn't, but my wife did!"
Where do fish keep their money?
In a river-bank!
A man sees a small boy begging for money He walks up to him and asks him if he is an orphan.
The boy asks "what gave me away?"
The man responds "your parents"
I'm not gay, but fifty dollars is fifty dollars.
What's the difference between $1 Million and Baby Teeth? I don't have $1 Million in my wallet.
Son:mom can i borrow 50$?
Mom:What NO WAY what do you think money grows on trees?
SOn:mom what is money made of
Mom:paper
Son:where does paper come from?
Mom: . . .
What did the racist serial killer say to the cop?
“Wait, you’re getting paid?”
What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.
a man got fired from the first coin factory. he exclaimed "no! this is the only thing thats ever made cents!!"
Kid:licks money Mom: hey don’t lick the money it is dirty Kid: is that why they call people filthy rich
I asked the gym trainer what type of machine i should use to get the best looking women
He said the ATM outside
If having sex for money makes you a wh*re then what does having sex for free make you? Non-profit wh*reganisation
The trıp from your eyebrow to your hairlıne costs 6000$.
The Good Old Days > You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
