Mom's jokes
Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?
Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!
The way you are so ugly your parents even regret the day you were born.
The way you are so black when your mom is bathing you in the dark, she has to put flour in the water to see you.
🤣🤣🤣
Kid: I got homework.
Mom: Ok, so?
Kid: I got a F in my balls.
When your mom says it will all be ok if you just......... *there is blood on the floor*
When you say, "I wish I could cut off these bumps on my neck." (Your mom walking to you with a knife.)
So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."
Mom, start eating, or else you will get fatter!
Guy on Fortnite: "Ima sleep with your mom lmao."
Orphan: Starts crying.
My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.
What do youuuuuuuuuuu Oh f***, my mom is gonna kill me! My shit is stuck on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your mama is so ugly, when she went to the circus they thought she was Pennywise, Mom.
If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?
What do a banana and shampoo have in common?
Ur mom.
Why did your mom cross the road?
You were on the same side as her, and she wanted to get as far away from you as possible.
What does the mom (or terrorists, fuck that) say for the (twin) towers to eat?
Open wide, here comes the plane!
Why couldn't your mom make you dinner? Because she's dead!
If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.
My mom was telling me about different pastas. So many pastabilities!
My mom told me to help her with the laser, but it was opposite day, so I pushed her down.
She said help, so I kicked her.
The mom and dad left the child because they were famous and rich, like rich monkeys.