Mom's jokes

My Mom said she's going to kill me if I don't stop using my computer.

My mom said my sister was an angel, but when I threw her out the window, she didn't fly.

Your mom is so hairy that King Kong got jealous of her.

My mom loves balls.

But my dad has been gone for the last 4 years.

What do youuuuuuuuuuu Oh f***, my mom is gonna kill me! My shit is stuck on the toilet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My mom told me to help her with the laser, but it was opposite day, so I pushed her down.

She said help, so I kicked her.

The mom and dad left the child because they were famous and rich, like rich monkeys.

Why couldn't your mom make you dinner? Because she's dead!

If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.

If my mom decides to get Chick-fil-A for dinner, and when I decide to eat my family for dinner, is that called cannibalism?

So you mom call she side when Covin come home?

Roses are red, violets are blue, people think that you’re fat, until they saw your mom.

Your mom's so fat, she annexed Crimea!

Kid: I got homework.

Mom: Ok, so?

Kid: I got a F in my balls.

My mom once told me to spread positivity across the world, so I did.

I spread Covid across the globe because I tested positive :D

Me: Where's your mom?

Kid: [cries]

Me: [leaving from the adoption center]

In America, mom births you.

In Soviet Russia, you birth mom.

My girlfriend broke up with me today. Her mom had to take her to daycare. 😢😢😢

My mom is telling me to get off Friday Night Funkin' or she will slam my head against the keyboard: weherhrqqkh[qokqho[krq3[t4i2-4q43q343q44334q43.

Orphanage kid: You’re ugly!

Kid with mother: Your mom!