Mom's jokes

Your mom is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas, and it's still printing.

Your mom is so ugly Biden likes her.

One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"

How are shark eggs and your mom the same? They're both the biggest thing ever laid.

I remember my mom's last words before her divorce, "Did you just load in me?"

What's the best part of not wearing a condom when I'm with my girlfriend? My mom went through menopause.

Me and my mom order Chinese food. So when it came, my mom grabbed the egg roll and started to suck it down. Then I ask my mom what are you doing. Then my mom says, "I love you for 5 dollar."

I fucked your mom.

Your hairline is so bad, I do your mom so hard!

Boys: “Hey, can Billy come out and play baseball?”

Mom: “That would be fine, but he hasn’t come out of his room since Friday.”

Boys: “Have you checked the closet?”

What are the last two words you say after sex before going to sleep?

"Goodnight, Mom!"

When your mom comes in at night then sees your... sleeping, but sees something moving, so she gets a chair and whacks it, then she says, "I thought it was a mouse."

Your mom has a bone to pick with me.

Evan, this is Mya, and your mom told me you were adopted, so we are done. Bye, don’t talk to me.

Guys tell me that I have a MILF for a mom. So I told my mom that guys tell me that she is a MILF. My mom said to me, "What is a MILF?" so I said, "Mother I'd Like TO F-ck." So my mom started to laugh and said, "Well, you do need a new step dad."

Kid at school tells an orphan, "I fucked your mom."

Orphan: "What's a mom?"

Spanish is difficult. When my mom gives me food, she says "toma," and that's drink in English, so I always drink my food.

Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young to be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.

Your earlobes are so big, you can fit your mom inside of them 5000 times and still have room for more!

Roses are red, violets are blue.

Your mom is fat and so are you.