Mom's jokes

My mom is bad and my dad is bad.

Your mom is so fat, she starts with the letter O in the alphabet because O.B.C.D. (Obesity).

Your hairline is so big it took your mom a map to find it.

Technically speaking, "ur mom/ur father" jokes have no effect on orphans.

I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!

Me be like: ;-;

What should you never say to an orphan?

"Your Mom."

Little Herobrine, I'm cumming in ur mom! Call me Saddam Hussein cuz I'm dropping rap bombs!!

When you ask your mom for candy but you grab from the wrong drawer...

Your mom is so fat, when she asked, "What gift will I get?" Abuela from Encanto said, "Definitely Taco Bell!" 🌮🔔

My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.

Kids when they meet a kid out of home alone be like: “At least your mom came back!”

What did the mom say when her child came out?

"The head was so big!"

When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"

What did the orphan say to his stepmom?

"I need help."

Mom: I was an orphan once. The kid: Oh, ok, idgaf. Mom: And you're gonna be too! :) The kid: Ok, idgaf- WAIT WHAT THE FU-

I’d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!

I asked my mom if I can help her out with the cooking, she answered yes.

A few hours later, dinner was ready and dad came to join. Mother said, "Honey, can you get the mashed potatoes?" Dad said, "Why, she’s right here."

Tell your mom I don't like waiting in queues.

As a straight son, one day I asked my mom, "Have you ever quit something that you did before?" My mom said, "No, I never quit anything." So I asked my when you give a blow job you ever spit, then my mom said, "What did I say? Quitters are for spitters."

Mum finds out child cheats in math test.

Mom says, "There is no cheating in this house."

Child: "Then why did you cheat with my math teacher last night?"