Miscellaneous jokes
It squirted in my eye, God dammit!
I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song, cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mom.
What is 14 inches long and starts with D?
A Dookie From GREEN DAY
She’s so therapeutic.
When I need to cure my restlessness, I br-br-br-br-br-br-br-br motorboat your mom's breastestess!
What do you get if you cross a zebra and a donkey?
Zeedonk.
Your momma is so ugly that she went out as herself for Halloween.
Why do I carry pepper spray?
Just in case of as-SAULT.
Yo mama is so slow, when she stepped on the highway they had to order a crane to come move her from starting traffic.
Wanna hear a joooooooke?
Your life.
How would Steven Hawking's mom punish him as a kid?
Power off his chair.
How do u catch a tame rabbit?
The tame way.
One day, I sit in the lounge on a chair.
So a man asked another man, "What's your name?"
He says, "What's it to ya?"
So the guy asked again, "And he says what's it to ya?"
Come to find out his name was What's It To Ya.
So a kid asks his dad, "Why was I born?"
The dad replies, "I thought that girl was dead!"
Why was the egg naughty? Because he wanted a good cracking!
She likes the Donkey-Punch. She likes the Dirty Sanchez. Sometimes she even likes to fool around in your bed!
What's the difference between a Black person and a white person?
Black people don't shoot up schools.
What if some kid was like, "I'm going to shoot up the school!", and then someone just pulls up with a reverse card?
A guy walks into a gun store and everything is half off. He looks at his son and says, "I didn't know back to school sales started yet."
Why did the cowboy die with his boots on??
He didn’t want to stub his toe when he kicked da bucket 😂🤣👌🏻👌🏻.. knee slapper