Mind jokes

I had something about tripping over ice.

Well, it slipped my mind, so I'll just test some diamonds to see if they're ice.

Hey, can I tell you a joke about pencils? Never mind, it's pointless.

Wanna hear a pizza joke?

Never mind, it's too cheesy.

The bears came home. Daddy bear said, "Who's been eating my porridge?" said, "Who's been in my porch?" Baby bear said, "Never mind about the porridge, who knocked the telly?"

In the realm of pixels and screens, Josh pursues videos, a world unseen. Six dollars exchange, a transaction made, A story told, emotions cascade.

The power of film, a gift divine, Stirring souls, weaving through time. Six dollars spent, a connection formed, A simple act, a heart transformed.

In every frame, a universe unfolds, Captivating minds, stories untold. Josh buys videos for six, a token small, Yet within them lies magic, captivating all.

Boy: Have you heard of the cool kid who just told us he had autism?

Teacher: What?

Boy: Well... never mind, he's well supported.

Free will is like having a vagina. You don't need to know how to use it, and you don't need to know what it does, but what matters is that you have it.

Do you want to hear a joke about paper?

Never mind, it's tear-able.

I rub lipstick on my forehead to make up my mind.

In a world bizarre, Penis burgers, strange delight, Tantalizing taste.

Buns shaped curiously, Meat, a bold centerpiece, Lingering delight.

Sizzling grill, they sizzle, Juicy secrets unfold, Hidden pleasures found.

Tempting, yet absurd, Controversial cuisine, Curiosity piques.

Daring, adventurous, Palates embark on a quest, Uncharted flavors.

But let us not dwell, On the phallic form they hold, For taste transcends all.

Beyond flesh-shaped buns, Flavors dance upon our tongues, A feast for senses.

So let us partake, In this culinary art, With open-minded hearts.

How does Helen Keller say "dad?"

I don’t know, but you should ask her... wait, never mind, she can’t talk.

Wanna hear a pizza joke? Never mind, it's too cheesy.

What was the last thing that went through the minds of the 9/11 jumpers?

Their ankles.

Lololol get it? They fell from like 100 feet.

Sad news, my obese parrot died today.

Mind you, it's a huge weight off my shoulders.

I asked my nan if she wouldn't mind shitting in a bucket when we went camping. She replied, "Why the fuck would I want to sit in a bucket?" So eventually she did, and I took the best shit I have ever had!

You're so bald, I can see what's on your mind.

When you see a woman with a leg chain, what usually comes to your mind?

Me: *in a family meeting*

Mom: Ok guys...

Me in my mind: BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA BLA

I can tell you a pun about a pencil, oh! Never mind, it’s pointless.

Want to hear a joke about pizza?

Never mind, it's too cheesy.