Metaphor

Metaphor Jokes

Maze

What's the difference between a maze and a depressed life? One of them you can find a way out of.

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  • Marriage

    Marriage is like a deck of cards.

    In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond.

    By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.

    Future

    My future is so bright, I need a flashlight to see where I'm going.

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  • Memes

    Bread

    My mom is the jelly, and my dad is the peanut butter. And I am the bread, the only thing keeping them together.

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  • Insult

    If I wanted to commit suicide, I would climb up to your ego, and then jump down to your IQ.

    Self Harm

    My pencil sharpener when I bleed:

    And I don't really care how bad it hurts. Cause you broke me first.

    Penis

    Life is like a penis. Long, free, flowing, and soft, until a woman comes and makes it hard. 😉

    9/11

    Q: How do you make a 9/11 cocktail?

    A: Light two Manhattans on fire and then knock them over.

    Emo

    What fell down the tree first, the emo or the apple?

    Guess what? The apple, because the emo got left hanging.