Mentality jokes

A conman, a mentally handicapped person, and a Russian spy walk into a bar.

And the bartender asks, "What will it be, Mr. President?"

What did the blind, deaf, mentally handicapped orphan get for Christmas?

Cancer.

Why is falone mentally disabled?

Who knows, and quite frankly, who cares?

What mental disorder do all Mexicans have?

Borderline Personality Disorder.

In History class, the teacher taught a lesson about serial killer Albert Fish. Back in the early 20th century, Fish reportedly kidnapped, ate, and raped over 100 kids. He mainly chose victims who were either retarded or black. Further on the lesson, the teacher explained how in those days, black people were socially not equal with white people, and how people with mental illness were not accepted and treated properly due to a lack of knowledge of mental health.

One of the students raised their hand and said, “You ought to be arrested.” The teacher confusedly asked, “Why?” The student explained, “Because you’re thinking like Albert Fish.”

My doctor asked my brother if anyone in the family suffers from mental illness.

He replied: "No, we all seem to rather enjoy it!"

I troll under different usernames. I'm a bit all over the place mentally.

Gay is a mental illness.

You're not thinking straight.

What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?

Tic-tac-toe.

Mom: That's why your dad left you.

Me: Why?

Mom: I mean look at you, depressed, suicidal, and unhappy, always anxious, and other mental health issues.

Me: How is that my fault? You are a rude mom!

Mom: Your dad had a heart attack two weeks before you were born, because you are ugly!

(This actually did happen in real life.)

What do you call a retarded fruit?

Mentally in-pear-ed.

I went to the mental hospital. I asked one of the kid what its favorite animal was. They said a bird. I asked for a reason. It's because they both jump off roofs.

Men and women are not equal, speaking biologically and mentally. I don't care what other feminists say. Men are naturally physically stronger, while women are more mentally stable (sometimes). The internet and the media will lie. You feminists say that you are stronger. Well, you wish. You can't hit a girl because she is more sensitive, but she says she is stronger. Like, what the hell?

We're not sexist men; you're sexist women. And BTW, you'll rot in hell for hating God's creation. And also, men were created before women. Search it up in the Bible or online.

There are 3 Genders.

1: Man

2: Woman

3: Mentally ill.

You guys, this is my last time publishing something here. You guys have been sending rude comments, and I need to work on my mental health. Goodbye.

What do you call a nut that screws and then bolts?

An escapee from a mental hospital.

Why are Christmas trees banned at the mental hospital?

They would hang themselves like ornaments.

If a mentally challenged person shows up late,

Is it ok to call him tardy?

Fella walks past a mental hospital; they're all out in the garden behind this big fence, all shouting "13, 13, 13, 13," etc., over and over again.

This fella is intrigued, sees a little hole in the fence, looks through it... gets fucking poked straight in the eye!

Then they all start singing, "14, 14, 14, 14, 14, 14!"

Really feeling suicidal is basically having a mental breakdown, but realizing you have nothing nice and sharp to use.