ME jokes

Gender

  • Best friend *holds a sign up that says "what gender are you?"*

    Me: Uh, male?..

    Best friend *then unfolds paper so it reads "what gender are you attracted to?"*

    Me: You silly goose.

    *Silence for like three seconds*

    Me: Still male though-

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  • Dementia

  • Guy, it was so weird yesterday. I saw a guy, and he kept repeating the same thing over and over. I hate people with dementia. I told my mom to get a new mirror, but she won’t listen to me. It’s almost like I said it like 20 times every time I say it.

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  • Dairy

  • A man came up to me and threatened me with his milk, cheese, and butter... how dairy!

    Chicken

  • Someone: "I got chickens out there vibin'."

    Me: "What? Oh, you mean those over-sized chickens that just show an example of you in real life?"

    Someone: . . .

    Hairline

  • Me before: Why do bandanas exist? They're ugly.

    Me after seeing your hairline: Oh, I seeee.

    Me giving pro tip: Get a bandana LMAO.

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  • Orphan

  • I walked past an orphanage, the orphans started to call me names, and I said, "At least I have a family!"

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