How many redheads does it take to change a lightbulb?
One! She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
Many Jokes
What has one head, one foot and four legs? A: A Bed
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in The Alphabet? A: There are 11 letters in The Alphabet
Q: How can you spell cold with two letters? A: IC (icy)
Q: What state is surrounded by the most water? A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle)
Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and ? A: David!
Q: If you were in a rainforest, what would be the first thing you put on? A: The radio!
What has one head, one foot, and four legs? A: A bed.
Q: Did you hear the joke about the roof? A: Never mind, it's over your head!
Q: How many letters are in the alphabet? A: 11. A-L-P-H-A-B-E-T.
How do you check that a rabbit is old?
You check how many gray hares it has.
How many times can you subtract ten from one thousand?
One; after that you're subtracting ten from 990.
How many times can you subtract 10 from 100?
Once. The next time you would be subtracting 10 from 90.
A man came up to a girl about to jump off a cliff. The man said, "Why?" She then replies, "There are many monsters in this world, and I am one of them."
Why did Alice from Wonderland get her butt stuck in the rabbit hole at first? Because she probably ate too many hamburgers and drank too much wine just out of nowhere, then told her butt to hold it in before more food pops out.
I'm just here to say that I don't approve of political jokes.
I've seen too many of them get elected.
Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?
Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.
How many gears does a French tank have?
One forward and six reverse.
How did Jesus kill himself?
He fell from his bike.
How many times did he die?
Once on a bike and once when he fell from a cloud in Heaven.
How many fingers am I holding? I'm not holding any fingers.
Student: There are 505 rocks in a car. If 8 fall out, how many are left?
Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left.
Student: Ok!!
Student: How do you put an alligator in a closet?
Teacher: You can't, it won't fit.
Student: No!! Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door.
Teacher: Ohhh, now I get it.
A man walks in to the doctor.
He says, "Doctor, I need a new butt. Mine has a crack in it."
Doctor: How many times do I have to tell you!!!
Laila has 69 boobs, but that is 222 too many. One day, she went on 51st Street to meet Dr. X, who ate all her boobs, and now she's boobless :)
6922251 x 8 = 55378008. Put the calculator upside down.
Why is the eagle a bird with many skills? Because it’s talon-ted!
There were 25 cows, 28 chickens. How many didn't?
(Ten, if you count in base 13!)
How many babies does it take to paint wheels red?
It depends on your speed.
One man said, "Do you need 20 bucks?"
The other said, "Do you have that many?"
