How are a bald eagle and a bald man similar? Because they both have eyes.
So a man walks into the bar. The bartender looks to him and says, “You look like your having a rough day, tell me about it?”
The man then stood up and became mario
One day a Chief was talking to his son…“Son,” the father said, Long ago the Woman didn’t have anybody to take her to BINGO. So, the Creator put the Woman to sleep and cut off her butt cheeks and made her a Man. That’s why today Indian Women have no butt, and the Men are called Buttheads!"
i always felt like a man trapped in a womans body. But then I was born.
But In my defense , I was young then and I had a womb without a view.
I used to know a guy from a nudist colony
Man, I tell you, nothing looked good on him!
The man walks into a bar reaches into his pocket and pulls out a tiny piano and a tiny piano player the piano player starts playing the piano, the guy next to him asks where did you get that, the man says there is a genie out on the corner granting wishes, so the man sitting next to him jumps up and runs outside he says to the genie I want a million bucks, the genie snaps his fingers and a million ducks appear in the road, the man comes back inside and says hey that genie is a little hard of hearing, the man says well did you really think I’d ask for a 12-in pianist
lol 1 week anniversary of me being on Worst Jokes Ever…
J0K35: LETS START A JOKING KEGGAR
A Joking keggar is where i get you drunk with some jokes, only on a special occasion.
Ok, yall ready to get drunk with raging jokes? OK LETS GOOOOo
What do you call an LGBTQ+ disc jockey?
A DG (dee gay)
What does lava use when it can’t walk properly?
A volCANEo
What do crackheads do when a black man got brutalitized?
They start a HIGHot (say it like hiot riot)
What is Satan’s favorite DJ?
MarshHELLo
What do neck breakers use?
Snapchat
What did Twitter and Reddit eat with chocolate and marshmellows?
Instagraham crackers
Is this the last joke?
No
What is similar between a dog and my ex?
They are both commonly known as bitches
What number has a flu from a pig?
Nine flu (swine flu)
What did the loaf say when he was playing hide and seek?
BREADY OR NOT? HERE I GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Who is the best anime girl?
Well its pretty obvious 02 is on the second rank
Why did Sally get caned?
Because old men hurriCANED.
That was all
OR WAS IT?
Yes, it was (Come back on Halloween for another Joking Keggar)
Me sees crazy man hit a old poor person me dials 911 police:what is that location me:idk where is dis location police:mission failed we will try again later me:wth police:ends call me:calls hospital hospital:what is that location me:idk where is dis location hospital:mission failed we will try again later me:WTH IS HAPPENDS EVERY TIME NOW EVERYTHING IS ON FIRE hospital:hangs up me:calls fire dEpArTmEnT fire:no fire dEpArTmEnT:what is that location me:hangs up and give up and goes home
What did the but cheek say to the other when you open us a big order of choochie man comes out
A depressed kid was stuck on a tree, and a man saw the kid
Man: Hang in there! Im gonna get some help!
Two minutes later, the kid literally did what the guy said
RIP Daniel Kyre from Cyndago (July 6, 1994-September 18, 2015)
Daniel commited suicide five years ago today…
There was a boy in the gym who was in his late teens. He was sitting at the dumbells tables but he wasn’t lifting. He instead, sat up and was ripping something up. The manager then walked over to him, and asked “You’re hogging the dumbells, dude! What are you even doing?” The boy hesitated, then said “Getting ripped, wanna join me?” as he held up stacks of blank paper. The man silently sat on the table with him and grabbed some papers. “Why not?” he finally said.
A person laughs everyday. “Man,” they say, "I’m glad I’m not an egg, otherwise I’d just CRACK MYseLf uP!
Man: oi dude why did you shoot the orphans!? Other man: because Man: because why!? Other man: because who are they gonna tell their parents?
Friend: You ok man?
Me: Yea… I’ll just leave myself “hangin” tonight…
Why did Spider-Man decide to buy a laptop? So that he could design his own “ website “.
Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel a one penny in his pocket? He had a 6 cents of humor.
A MAN WALKED INTO A BAR…
OUCH!!!
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders. As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, “I’ll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, ‘I don’t know how you can make love to me with your type of body.’ So I asked her, ‘How about a little head?’”
Other jokes:
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Why did the ketchup blush? He saw the salad dressing.
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What did the elephant ask the naked man? How do you breathe out of that thing?
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How do you make your husband scream during sex? Call him and let him hear it.
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Why does the mermaid wear seashells? She outgrew her b-shells!
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How is life like toilet paper? You’re either on a roll or taking shit from someone.
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What does one boob say to the other boob? If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.
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What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A man will actually search for a golf ball.
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What did Cinderella do when she arrived at the ball? She gagged.
I once saw a one handed man in a second hand store. I said to him: “i don’t think they have what you’re looking for sir”
Dyslexic man walks into a bra.
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