Mammal jokes
What animal lies? A lion.
I would never kill an animal. I'm more of a people person.
Two female mice met and one spoke:
"Yesterday I met a mouse. He was black, and he had wings, and he had some cool, sharp teeth. He said he only ate at night."
Other mouse: "Umm... that's a bat."
"That asshole! He told me that he is a pilot!"
What do you call a bear with no ears? A b.
Yeah, that joke was unbearable.
What is a cow on two legs?
Yo mama!
Q: What do you do if you bump into a koala?
A: You koalagize to it.
Two whales went to a bar.
The first whale said, "oooooooohhhhhh." The second whale said, "Greg, I think you're drunk, let's go home."
What goes "Ooooooo"?
A cow with no lips.
What do you call two bears jerking each other off?
Bipolar.
A baby seal walked into a club.
Why did the zebra cross the road?
A llama kicked me out of my house. Alpaca my bags.
What did the whale say?
Nothing!
It just wailed.
A seal walks into a club.
Why do animals have playing cards with foxes?
Because they’re a bunch of cheetahs!
Why do cheetahs have spots?
Chickenpox!
A baby seal walks into a club...
When a donkey digs a tunnel, it is called a burro.
Why isn't a koala a bear? It doesn't have the koalafications.
I named my horse Mayo.
Mayo neighs.