Make jokes

Suicidal people are a big contributor to the rope making industry.

I tried making an orphan baseball team. It sucked because they couldn’t find home plate.

My sister argued with me that you can't make a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen her face when I drove pasta!

What do you call sex?

Making cake.

Men, get into the kitchen and make me a sandwich!

Women, go chop some lumber!

White people, get back into the cotton fields!

Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."

God creating cats.

GOD: Make the most fluffy cute thing you can think of.

ANGEL: Ok.......................................anything else?

GOD: YES, PUT RAZOR BLADES ON ITS FEET!!!!!!!!

I'd make a joke about Noble Gases, but I probably wouldn't get much of a reaction.

I tried out some puns to make people laugh, but no pun in ten did.

A wife and husband were setting up their computer, and the husband made the password "my dick." But the wife fell on the floor laughing because the computer said the password was too short.

I'd make 9/11 jokes, but they'd just crash and burn.

I should be ashamed of myself for making all these jokes at the expense of the disabled! After all, they can't even stand up for themselves.

I love the way the Earth rotates.

It really makes my day!

The point of war is not to die for your country, but to make the fresh recruit on the enemy's side die for his.

My reverse psychologist told me I didn't have it in me to make a recovery.

Chuck Norris can make an omelet from Kinder surprise.

I don’t have a joke but a poem about a sex/dark joke.

Row, row, row your boat, Gently down the stream. Merrily, merrily, merrily, I can make you scream!

I was going to make a pun about math, but my answers never add up.

If you're cleaning a vacuum cleaner, does that make you the vacuum cleaner?

What's the difference between a baby and an onion?

One cries when you peel its skin off, the other makes you cry when you peel its skin off.