I'm Alya. I'm a dumb whore who ruins people's fun on this sight made for jokes with categories for orphan jokes, but I like ruining people's fun.
Made Jokes
I made a website for orphans, unfortunately it doesn’t have a homepage.
What's a dead person's favorite sentence?
"I made it."
"People are more honest when they are tired, so I made my nephew do push-ups 50 times when I realized he stole my cookies."
Are you made of gold, titanium, sulfur, titanium, and carbon?
Cuz you’re looking a little big Au Ti S Ti C.
What was the first man made out of? Adams! (Atoms)
So I made a parody for "Me, Myself, and I." It goes like this: "Me, Myself, and I, I'm gonna drink bleach until I die!"
A man walks into a bar and sees a jar full of money, and he asks the bartender what's up with that jar of money.
Bartender says you gotta do 3 tasks. He takes the shot of Jack, and the customer says, "What are the tasks?" He says, "The 1st one is, well the 1st 1 is, I got about a 12' gator in the back that's got a bad tooth, and you gotta pull it." He says, "All right, what's the 2nd 1?" He said, "I got a big old girl upstairs that ain't had no loving in a long time, you gotta make her smile." He takes another shot of Jack. He said, "All right, what's the 3rd 1?" He said, "You see that horse outside, you gotta make him laugh and cry."
Guy goes upstairs, goes out back, comes out to the front, comes back in. The other customer said, "Give him the jar." The guy says, "I took care of that lady's tooth, and I made that alligator smile."
"Well how'd you make the horse laugh?" he said. "Easy, I told him I had a bigger deck then him."
Bartender says, "How did you make him cry?" He said, "Easy, I showed him."
God made Adam and Eve have sex right out the gate.
Then he made teenagers horny... yet here we are with a so-called "rise in teen pregnancy."
Who was the first carpenter?
Eve, she made Adam's banana stand...
Mum: Why are roses red?
Child: Stop, Mum, you never make jokes.
Mum: I made you.
I have made a new word: Plagiarism.
Why did he die?
Because God made a mistake and pressed Ctrl+Z.
Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.
What makes all these categories so familiar? Either you've experienced them, or made them up in your backstory.
I knew the human race made mistakes, but you're the worst I've seen so far...
On Paxomedy channel, I made a video of a Rooster and a dog fighting.
I needed to know why they were fighting. Once I dug down into the issue, it turned out that the Dog called the Rooster a Cock, and the Rooster laughed and called the Dog a useless Bitch, and that was the beginning of their fight, and weird enough, the Cock won!
I went to congratulate the winner, but he thought he was insulting me by calling me Zinjathropus, but I said that was a compliment because Zinja was an old skeleton found in Africa, and I am African. I said to the Rooster he shouldn't have fought with the dog just because he called him a Cock. He said that being called a Cock is a compliment, and the fighting was his exercise to toughen up for serious fights with Dogs!
A guy on a bus saw a beautiful girl. He asked for her number, and of course, she said no. He asked the bus driver for advice, and he said, "That girl goes to the cemetery to pray every day at 10 p.m. and look for a statue of an angel." So he dresses up as God, goes to the grave, and she sees him. She says, "Oh, Lord, end my misery! Kill me now!" And he said, "Only if you do something for me first." She replied, "What is it, oh mighty Lord?" He said, "Have sex with me." She agreed. They had sex, and when she was done sucking his dick, he said, "I have something to tell you." He took off his costume and said, "I'm the guy from the bus." And she took off her costume: "I'm the bus driver."
(Does anyone remember this? It's an old joke someone made, or does no one remember this? I didn't make this, but it went smth like this)
This is a joke about Ms. Ploopatoink, a made-up character who is a pink fluffy pony who loves toilet paper.
Why is Ms. Ploopatoink like a toilet plunger?
They both jump in the toilet!
My name is Gwen, and I say rape jokes aren't funny. It's not funny for people to have sex with you without you agreeing. Also, they're getting old and NOT FUNNY! If anyone has something to say, please do. Comment if you agree or not. It's okay; I want to hear what you say. Just tell me if they are not funny.
We will have a contest to see how many people comment on saying they're good and funny, or people saying they're bad and terrible jokes and should not be made. May the best votes and comments win.
What do you call a pie made by an octopus? Octopie.