MA jokes

School

Sarah goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?" Sarah waves her hand, "Me, Miss Rogers, me, me!" Miss Rogers says, "All right, Sarah, what is your multi-syllable word?" Sarah says, "Mas-tur-bate." Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, Sarah, that's a mouthful." Sarah says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."

Suicide

Me: I'm home, ma! Here's her with a new dad. Her: Go hang with someone. Me: Gets the noose, goes to fav tree. I love you, ma. πŸ™‚

Cat

This is how big cats were named.

"I HATE BIG CATS. THAT ONE IS A LIAR, THAT ONE IS A CHEATER. THE ONE IS A POO-MA."

"Lion. Cheetah. Puma. You're getting a promotion."

Clock

How did the digital clock show off to its mother?

Look, Ma, no hands!

Memes

Papa

Girl (on thirteenth birthday): Ma, why did papa leave?

Mother: Well, it started exactly 1 year and 189 days ago...

Jail

I ran into a kid today. Now I'm in jail and I lost my driver's license.

Orphan

Maybe we should stop talking about orphans, their parents will get ma... oh wait.

Restaurant

A couple enters a Chinese restaurant and takes their seats.

The waiter asks, "ζƒ³εƒδ»€δΉˆ (Xiang Chi Shen Ma)?"

The wife responds, "吃鸑巴 (Chi Ji Ba)!"