A retired George W. Bush is eating a donut at 7/11 and looks at it. "I'm so happy I did that." A guy overhears the conversation and says, "You're happy you bought that donut? Oh haha, I would be too. I love donuts!" George W. Bush then says, "Oh hahaha, you caught me," and then says, "Oh hahaha, you must have heard me wrong. I said, I'm so happy I did 9/11."
Look Jokes
POV: Wine Taster in hell.
I was sitting with the best wine ever made on the table in front of me. This silhouette begins to speak, "You have risen to be the most superb Wine Taster on Earth. Then you got run over by a truck hauling freshly made wine to a warehouse. Your crimes are as follows: you left your high school prom date with another man after you got her pregnant, you let your mother believe that the cat ran away after you drowned it in the pool, and you never got married. How do you plead?"
The man looked at the silhouette like it was a purple rabbit.
"Guilty," said the man, "but if you would be so kind would you at least tell me what the wine in front of me tastes and smells like? I will take any punishment you deem fit."
"Very well," said the silhouette, "but you will regret that request."
Out of the shadows comes a boy only looking 19 years old. The boy says, "I will you taster today. I am confident about my sense of taste." The boy takes the first bottle and opens it, pours it into a wine glass, and swirls it around. He then takes a sniff and begins to drink, to the Wine Taster he says, "Mmmm, taste like chicken."
Shut up with that Vegeta looking hairline!
Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered, "Y?"
What do you say to a black midget?
Wanna a shower? You look like you got splashed by a muddy puddle.
I felt bad for a dog, and I looked to my left, and there was an orphan, and I said I will make you a website, and I said there won't be a homepage.
Wanna hear a joke?
Look in the mirror; I'm sure you'll find one there :')
What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy?
Fat guy: Does this look fat on me?
Skinny guy: No, I don’t think it’s that.
Fat guy: Thinking.
You look like the type of guy to wash his/her hands after a shower! (And don't write in the comments that there are more than 2 genders.)
"It looks like she went into Claire’s Boutique, fell on a sale rack, and said, ‘I’ll take it!’" — Bianca Del Rio, RuPaul’s Drag Race
I looked at your hairline, and when I saw you, I thought to myself of the last time I was a baby.
Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.
I don't trust trees...they look shady.
How do you say “Yes, you look good” in Spanish?
– Sí...
See deez nuts!
You look at it. You tug on it like a shoe string. You play with it like elastic bubble plastic, but it still never grows.
I wasn't looking at you, your big forehead was distracting me.
It looks like your dad is not the only one missing.
A dolphin swims into a bar and looks at the menu. He calls the bartender and orders a pint of ginger-whale.
Are your forehead and your hairline best friends because they look like they go way back?
You abuse me that I have no beards, but your sugar daddy shaved them off to look cute. 🤔
