New Born jokes
Crispy, Juicy, Tender, I just put my new-born son in a blender.
Why did the United Nations stop the French government from using the guillotine in public?
Because the French government was using the guillotine on newborn babies for circumcision.
What's the difference between a newborn baby and an orphan after a rugby match?
They both come out bloody and crying, but at least one gets picked up.
Bro looks like his mom dropped him when he was a new born
What do Chinese parents hate the most?
A newborn daughter...
I thought gender reveal parties were only for newborns, not for teenagers.
A boy and his mother survived a car crash.
The boy asks his mother, "Was that like how I was born? A hard smash?" The mother replies with "More like an accident."
Babies can spread a nasty smell,
especially when you haven't fed them for a month.
The person who made it a law to not hurt girls is stupid because we've all kicked a pregnant woman before we were even born.
What's red and in a corner?
A baby with a razor blade.
What's green and in a corner?
The same baby three weeks later.
Chinese kid was born before the due date. Parents name him "Sudden Lee."
