Look jokes
Luke looks like Big Chungus and Fat Sonic.
When they said sin was ugly to look at, I didn't know God would use you as an example.
I knew a guy who would always claim he had a buddy with an IQ of 1.
It turns out he was just looking in the mirror.
What do you do when you run out of carpets? Fetch your shotgun and look for Explain Bear.
You ever look back at your ex and are like, "Wow! What was I thinking?"
Then I start to think I was the problem :(
Just kidding, fuck that asshole!
Ever noticed that "lol" looks like a person drowning?
If you mixed the Iraq wheat scandal with the basics card paying other people's dole to your wife and tumble dried it in a royal commission that made your priestly mates look bad, what would you get?
Tony Abbott's career.
If you tried to look at your hairline in a mirror, it would shatter into 100,000,000,000 pieces.
Dating in your 30s is like looking for a parking spot...
The good ones are all taken. The rest are either handicapped or too far away.
I looked so deep in the dark web, I started to see Tyrone.
"Hey, look, that plane is getting bigge-"
Your hairline is so pushed back it looks like Will Smith slapped it back.
One day my kid with no arms came up to me and said, "Mom, what's dark humor?" I thought about it, then said, "Go wave to that blind person." He just looked at me, confused, but angry.
What do me and a blind person have in common after I look at Alfie's mum?
We're both blind.
You look too old to be living with your grandma.
Magician: "I am the greatest magician in the whole world. Look, now you see the rabbit in the hat, and now it is gone!"
Redneck girl: "That's nothing. My dad is the greatest magician! He disappears for a whole year and reappears at Christmas for a couple of hours!"
My friend looks more red than Mr. Krabs.
It’s weird, I could’ve sworn I saw the silhouette of a belt hurling towards him the other day.
Your momma so fat when she stepped on one scale, it broke. When she got another one, it said "TBC." She looked in the mirror, it broke.
During Halloween, my friend went as a skeleton.
He refused to go into the haunted house. Looks like he was SPINE-LESS.
Your hairline is like a math expression, there is no solution.