Livestock jokes
What do cows call money?
Moola.
Hey girl, are you a farmer? Because you sure know how to raise a cock.
What do you call a pig in a farm?
- A pig in a farm.
Where do you find a cow with no legs?
Right where you left it!
What do you call a legless cow?
Handicapped and stupid and monke and food.
Two cows are standing in a field. One cow says to the other, "What do you think about that mad cow disease?"
The other replies, "Well I don't have to worry about it. You're talking to a telephone pole."
Why did the cow not want to talk to the other cow? Because they had beef with each other.
So in class, they were learning about where food comes from:
Teacher: So kids, where does bacon come from?
Student: PIGS!
Teacher: Correct. Where does mutton come from?
Student: SHEEP!
Teacher: And finally, here’s your homework.
Student: IK where that comes from!
A FAT COW! 😂😂
Why can you never find a virgin cow on a field with no bulls for miles? Just ask the redneck farmer.
What do you call a pig?
Pig.
What do you call a fantastic goat?
Goatastic! So funny please like.
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting Cow.
Interrupting Co- MOO!
Where do sheep go to shop?
Woolmart.
What is the worst part of milking a cow? The smell of the dairy air.
Two cows are grazing in a field.
One cow says to the other, "You ever worry about that mad cow disease?"
The other cow says, "Why would I care? I'm a helicopter!"
What do you call a sleeping cow?
A bull-dozer.
Why don’t cows have any money?
Because farmers milk them dry.
What do you call a cow grazing a field with 50% grass and 50% weed? High steaks gambling.
What do you call a cow that has two legs shorter on one side of its body compared to the other? LEAN BEEF!