Little jokes

Why couldn’t little Susie stay on the swing?

She had no arms.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Not Susie.

My friend Richard is always bullying all the little kids in the neighborhood. He is such a dick.

Hey guys, thank you for finding this. Vote in the thumbs up or thumbs down whether you prefer Reese’s cups or Starbursts, and comment if you have a different preference! I would like to know a little about people! Thanks, Izzy.

"Rape is funny until it's your little sister or daughter getting raped."

I recently learned that churches won’t let trans men become priests because they don’t consider trans men as men, which is rather confusing to me.

As a Jew, I don’t know very much about Christianity, but from what I’ve heard, don’t priests love little boys?

One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"

What did the big chimney say to the little chimney? "You're too young to smoke."

Atoms are untrustworthy little critters. They make everything up!

I like Little Johnny's tight booty cheeks.

Little Johnny woke up at midnight on Christmas Eve to Santa with his pants down on top of his mom. He then said, "Ho ho OH YEAH!!!"

Little Johnny said to his mate, "I bet I can make you swear." His mate said, "Good luck." So Johnny told his mate that he slept with his sister. His mate yelled, "I'm gonna fucking kill you!"

Bully: Ur momma so fat that the whales said we are family even though you are a little bigger than us.

Nerd: Yo momma so ugly that when she went in the bathtub, the water jumped out.

Silence...................punch!

Kalyn: Mrs. Frizzle,

Mrs. Frizzle: Sure.

Kalyn: Can you spell I-C-U-P for me?

Mrs. Frizzle: Shut up, you little fucktard!

So one day a boy was at his dad's work when another little boy ran in crying. Then the dad said, "Aw, little boy, are you lost? Where's your parents?" And the little boy at his dad's work said, "OMG! Dad, you can't say that!"

Why can't he say that?

Answer: He works at an orphanage.

I might have to back down on this because it is usually aimed for little children.

What do you call a train that stalls?

The little engine that couldn't!

In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.

And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"

Cause she knows how I like it, and that I’m a little young to be in the bed, butt-naked doin' your mom.

"Hi, this is Stephanie. I was a little bit of a walk."

Motherhood is like a fairy tale, but in reverse. You start out in a beautiful ball gown and end up in stained rags cleaning up after little people.