Line jokes
S, ss, slalom. A.
What do you call a group of rappers waiting in line?
A rhyme queue.
Daveon is so straight, he thinks a straight line is the shortest distance between two points and nothing else.
Three girls were lined up for execution. The black-haired one, being the smart one, turned around and yelled, "Tornado!"
Everyone panicked, and she escaped. The red-headed one, following her example, shouted as the executioners got back, "Hurricane!"
The red-headed friend escaped too. Now, it was the blonde's turn. Following both her friends, she turned to the executioners and yelled:
"Fire!"
Heard Stephen Hawking is in a new movie and that the theme tune is absolutely banging. Think the opening line goes something like, “They see me rolling, they hating.”
Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?
Answer: The cancer ward. 😵😂😂
I have two things I wanna say:
1. When people swear, stop taking it so fucking literally. If someone calls you a bitch, they're not calling you a female dog. If they call you a cunt, they're not calling you a woman's private part, they are calling you either an idiot, scaredy cat/baby, or something along those lines, ffs.
2. wtf
Scratches on an icy road and kills 50 people on the bus, and when they get to Heaven, God feels so bad for them and grants them all one wish.
The first lady in the line was always worried about her looks, so she wished to be beautiful, and the guy behind her couldn’t think of what to wish about, so he also wished to be beautiful. This kept on going, but the guy at the end of the line started to laugh. When he got to God, God says, “What is your one wish, my son?” He said, “I wish you can make them all ugly again.”
Your hairline is so far back your mom can't cut it.
Why are the lines on the gay pride flag straight?
Incest.
When your genealogy chart is a straight line.
If a person walks off a hundred-foot cliff and halfway down screams, "Why did I do that?" Then a second person walks off the same one-hundred-foot cliff and screams the same verse, "Why did I do that?" Then another person walks off the cliff and screams the same line, "Why did I do that," and the next person does the same thing. What do you call that?
(Stupid People)
I have gathered intelligence regarding the Russian Forces that have been stalled in Ukraine for days. Apparently, they are installing rear view mirrors on their combat vehicles and tanks in order to see the battle at the front lines.
What's the difference between a magician and a chorus line?
The magician has a cunning array of stunts!
Lilly's hairline was so fat that Charlene could not find it on Roblox.
The average person in 2023 is less straight than the lines my 5th-grade P.E. teacher walked in college.
So I walk into a bar, and there’s people waiting in line to punch me in the face.
That’s the punch line.
Yo, hairline is as accurate as my jump shot.
I approached her in the checkout line and said, "Yo baby wassup?"
Your hairline is so far back, a pilot thought it was an airplane.