Limb

Limb jokes

If I ever find the doctor who screwed up my limb replacement surgery... I’ll kill him with my bear hands.

Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”

Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”

I was going to think of a good amputee joke...

But I’m stumped.

A limbless criminal has just been identified. Police say the suspect is armed and on the run.

What has 4 limbs and can make a sidewalk red? Me falling from a 20 story building.

Why wasn't the infant's entire body found?

Because the limbs are scattered around 43°17.7355’N, 113°58.4205’W.

After a surgery, a man claimed he couldn't feel his legs. I replied, "Of course not, I amputated your fucking arms!"

  • 3
  • What has 4 legs, then 3 legs, then 2 legs, then 1 leg, then no legs?

    A baby you cut one off each time.

    If you put an amputee with no limbs in a snuggie, it becomes a stubbie.

    If somebody cuts their leg off and hits you with it, would they be kicking or hitting you?

    I'm trying to come up with a set-up for an amputee joke, but I'm stumped.