Like jokes

One like and whatever you say in the comments I'll do, but one rule: it can only be 2-4 hours in or out of Gloucestershire and South Gloucestershire.

Uranus? More like urine is gassy! (Uranus is urine, by the way.)

Donald Trump didn't build a wall because he likes going to islands to touch little girls.

So, one day I walk up to my sister and tell her that she is adopted because she doesn't look like anyone in the family. She starts to cry. My mom asks why she's crying, and I say I told her she was adopted and I was there for the adoption, and we have papers. It was all a lie. She is not adopted, and everything is fine.

If I get 50 likes on this, I swear. 🦋

POKEMON THEME SONG JOKE: I wanna be the berry best, like no one ever was.

To bitch them is my real pest, to brain them in my toss. I will gravel across the land, perching war and wide. Fuse Pokemon to under-strand, the lower that's in psyche.

Poke him on! Gotta joke them all it's Fru and me, All I know is my dress tiny, Poke him on! Yeah, you're my pest friend, In a world you must de-blend, Poke him on!

Gotta joke them all my shirts so true, My outrage will flush us through. You bitch me and I ditch you, P-O-K-E-M-O-N!!!

Gotta joke them all, Gotta joke them all!

Poke him on!

TDS? More like STDs.

Osama be like: "Fuck boys, runway is full, better use this tower!"

Hey, I haven't been on for like 2 months. I don't know who is still on here or like if everyone left, but yuh, I just decided to come back. Hey.

An Indian has a seat between two Pakistani's on board an airplane.

It's quite obvious to each of the three men where they are from. The Indian asks, "Pardon me gentleman, you wouldn't mind me sitting between you, do you? This is my seat, after all."

The Pakistanis look at each other, and then look back at him. One of them smiles and says, "Not at all! After all, Pakistanis and Indians are brothers! Are we not?"

The Indian is delighted at how warm and friendly they are, and he takes his seat. Shortly the plane takes off and the three guys are just chilling until the Indian says, "You know it's going to be a long ride and I am getting thirsty. Brothers, can I get any of you like a drink?" Then one of them says, "Yes brother, I would like a Coke!"

The Indian slips off his shoes and walks barefoot to where the stewardess is at, and when the Indian is out of view, one of the Pakistanis spits into his shoe. The Indian comes back and gives him a Coke.

Then the other Pakistani says, "You know what brother? I would also like a Coke too!" The Indian happily obliges, and as soon as he is out of view, he also spits in his shoe before the Indian gives him a Coke.

Finally, the Indian slips on his shoes and suddenly realizes how wet they are. He shakes his head and says, "Brothers! Why must we do this to each other, spitting in each other's shoes and peeing in each other's Cokes?"

What does a cow sound like when in a horror house?

Moo mooo moooooooo (screaming)!

I don’t see why people say that emo kids don’t like to hangout. I seen them hanging all day.

Like this if you're an American.

I'm just like my LEDs, I'm meant to be hung.

You can sink the Titanic like you can drive a bike. Not a joke.

Why are women like diapers?

They’re usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable.

The teacher says to do your homework. I do. My friends do. One person never does any of his homework.

Eventually, we had to have fun. He said he didn't do it. WOW what did he do? I like to think he got smacked and nearly committed suicide.

Why don't orphans like getting lost?

Because if people find them, they ask, "Where are your parents?"

How are Black people like communism?

Because they’ll never work, but some of them are willing to give it a shot.

You're so ugly that you and Adolfo Hitler are like twins.