Like jokes

A boy with Down Syndrome was talking with his mom.

“Mom, why did God make me like this?” he said.

“It’s because God made you special,” she said.

“Just kidding, I was only talking about your needs.”

Good sex sounds like a white man walking across the street with flip-flops on.

One day Timmy walks in on his mum in the bath. Then he asks, “What’s that dark fuzzy thing, mummy?” and mum said, “It’s a bush, every girl has one!” Then the next day he walks in on his dad in the shower. So he asks, “Daddy, what’s that long thing?” The dad then says, “It’s a sexy boy” accidentally. Timmy asks his dad, “What does sexy mean?” And the dad says, “Your mother, of course,” making it seem like a child-friendly compliment. Then the next day at school Timmy wanted to compliment his teacher. He walks up to her and says, “You’re so so sexy!”

A boy and his friend were walking down the street.

Boy 1: "Bro, you still got my Nikes?"

Boy 2: "Yeah, sorry. I got them dirty."

Boy 1: "Please clean them, we have school tomorrow."

Boy 2 got back to his house and decided to clean his friend's shoes. After he finished drying them, he got stuck in his painfully small dryer. Then he remembered his brother needed something from the dryer. So he tried to get out, when his brother came in.

He came in twice.

(like if u understand)

Like if you have a boyfriend, girlfriend, or husband, or wife, or a crush.

Yo hairline be lookin' like Elmo's toe fungus.

The Titanic, just like my phone, IT JUST WON'T SYNC.

Edit: Never mind, it started to sync...

Relationships are like fat people.

Most of them don’t work out.

I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.

Americans be like: "Here is the US, we drive on the right side of the road."

England be like: "Here in the UK, we drive on the left side of the road."

Russians after a car accident be like: "Here in Russia, road is road."

My parents were concerned when I said I like to bleed, but at least I cut my risk of cancer and stroke in half.

What do orphans like about tattoos? They stick around.

How is baseball like cake?

They both need batters.

Whenever your ex says, "You'll never find someone like me," the answer to that is, "That's the point."

Suicidal ideation is like wanting to slaughter someone but knowing/feeling that you can't. It's also, in a way, kind of like seeing a really hot chick that you wish you could F, but you again for whatever reason you either feel you can't or you just can't.

Why don’t cannibal kids eat people with Down Syndrome? Because kids don’t like vegetables.

Daughter: "I know this is weird, but I feel like someone is watching me when I am sleeping."

Father: "Sorry."

My girlfriend is like treasure to me.

You need a shovel to find her.

My life is a lot like a game of Black Jack.

I always hit on 16, then get busted.

Little girls are like basic math. If they're under 13, you do them in your head.