Like jokes

"Goodness, that's what Post Malone sounds like?"

"Give me some pre-Malone hip hop any day!"

Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.

You're so fat that when you go on a walk with your friends, it looks like they are orbiting you.

Hello everyone, I would just like to apologize for participating in the protest and everything else I said. I was wrong and have recently found a way to see all these jokes as funny. I hope that you all can forgive me. ALYA

We need to stop making orphan jokes like this because they aren’t mean enough. We need more cruel jokes.

You guys know BeReal?

BeReal? More like cereal.

Get it? BeReal = cereal.

Why do orphans go on holiday?

To see what family is like.

Do you like my a-corn-y jokes?

One would think Dracula would have a lot of friends. Unfortunately, no one likes him. He is a pain in the neck.

The circular saw asked the chainsaw, "When am I as big as you?"

The chainsaw would answer with, "When you cut down some things in your life. Like your owner."

The circular saw would reply with, "What?"

You are like my girlfriend: imaginary and non-existent.

I’m part of the anti anime association, but I’m starting to like anime. What do I do?

And for the joke: What do you call a dog with no back legs and a pair of metal balls? Sparky.

You're like a cat, all you do is eat and sleep.

My jokes are like your dad, you only see them for a few days.

Are you an abstract manifestation of my childhood traumas and recent memories combined? 'Cause damn, you look like you came out of a dream!

Women be like, "Men's heights," then cry when they get called fat...

My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.

No, they will be wondering what I look like.

Yo, I feel like shit when you're around.

Why do you like cream instead of bugs?

Because bugs can kill you.

One day I visited my friend in a hospital.

I remember when I spoke, "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but I know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight!"

Yes, I talked about the heart monitor beside him.