Like jokes
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.
Q. Which game does necro like the most?
Into the dead part 1.
Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:
Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"
I can't decide if I like rocking chairs or not.
I keep going back and forth on them.
Memes
Me: I hit an orphan!
Mom: OMG WHY?
Me: Not like they can tell their parents-
Me: Do you like smash?
Friend: Smash Rolls?
Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!
Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
What's the difference between you and Frankenstein?
He is not ugly like you; plus, he has a wife.
Son: Dad, I'm gay.
Dad: I support you.
Son: I like you.
Dad: Get out and into my room!
Putin be like CSGO is much harder in real life!
All of a guy's sons came out gay. He ordered 10 shots in a bar.
The bartender asks, "Do you have anyone in your family who likes women?"
The man said, "My wife does!"
Like my daddy? Too bad you don't have one.
What's a ghost's favorite food?
I like some boo-ritos!
Like Markgeraldnasol and his Pokemon Jokes.
What do you call a killer that uses psycho powers?
Mr. Mime!
You know orphans are kinda like a house with no people in it.
Because it’s empty inside.
I like sucking the Twin Towers off, but then I forgot dad already finished the job.
What looks like half a cat?
The other half.
Quote of the day:
A bad attitude is like a flat tire. You can't go anywhere until you change it.
Chao!!!
The Blonde got a Ph.D.?
Yeah, like that would ever happen.
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.