Like jokes
Why do orphans not like July 24th??
Because it's Parents Day.
Why did the orphan get sent to the principal's office?
Because he punched dumbos like you people!
Son: Dad, I'm gay.
Dad: I support you.
Son: I like you.
Dad: Get out and into my room!
My sister told me she liked Medusa.
I said, "Huh?"
My sister said my blow jobs are so good she looks up at the guy's facial expression, and when they look down, they do nothing but stay still.
Bro's chin looks like it's from that movie cartoon named Kronk. No wonder he got stung by a bee and took an ibuprofen to reduce the pain, but instead it grew longer.
Memes
i need help i see this everywhere i look it kinda look like this
Thomas Jefferson’s 80th b-day bash be like:
Jackson: "CALHOUN! YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME - IN BED WITH THE CONSTITUTION??"
Dads are like boomerangs, I hope.
Me: Do you like smash?
Friend: Smash Rolls?
Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!
Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
Samuel liked Batman when he was a kid.
He still is a kid.
My dad told me a new version of a happy birthday song:
Happy birthday to you, you live in a zoo, you look like a monkey, and you smell like one too!
No offense to anyone reading this on their birthday.
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
Walk into the club like, "Wow, I got a big penis!"
Looking for true love. Must be into fun, likes to go out driving, playing the latest catching game and most importantly, must love kids. (PEADOPHILES MUST APPLY WITH HOW MANY KIDS YOU CAN CARRY!)
You look like a sandwich Bigfoot didn't even like.
The Blonde got a Ph.D.?
Yeah, like that would ever happen.
I would rather do my own laundry, not my uncle's laundry, because I ain't no damn butler like Alfred from Batman. I don't live in no damn Batcave by Gotham tity.
A guy walks into a bar, he's like, "What's your number, lad?" and the woman is like, "298-777-fatso.com" and he walked home depressed.
Why do many New Yorkers like watching Spider-Man?
Because he’s always on the webcast.
Orphan: I want to be like Batman.
Orphan worker: You are already like him, honey.
My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.
I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.