Lifestyle jokes
What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid?
One has a functioning neck.
What do I and a brand new chandelier have in common?
One of these days, we’re both gonna be hanging from the ceiling.
Why do emo kids cost so much?
Because they’re the only people you can scan at the checkout machine.
What do you call it when a gay guy eats Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
I used to be a man trapped in a woman’s body. But then I was born.
Memes
What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?
Tic-tac-toe.
What do emo boys and emo girls have in common? They both wanna die and cut so they can die faster, but they are already dead, already dead to me!
There is gonna be a huge party at the orphanage tonight because the parents ain't home.
Emo girls are bad, but what's worse? Cutting yourself.
How many Emos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They all just sit in the dark and cry.
What’s a Cannibal’s Favorite Food?
Ra-men.
What do you call a stoner when horny?
A weed whacker!
How do emos like their meat cooked?
Medium rawr.
What do you call an emo with no breasts? A cutting board.
What's a cannibal's favorite place?
A day care.
Why do orphans like emos?
Reverse "emo" and put an "h" in the beginning.
For an orphan, any bag of chips is family size.
Me be straight and bored.
Goes to my local bar which has a glory hole.
Out up spending the rest of the night there.
About to leave when, motherfucker, I realize I've been sucking a guy's cock this whole time.
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Imagine being emo.
Couldn't be me.
Yo mama so poor, she used a KFC bucket as a rain hat.