Lifestyle jokes
Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
He sipped his coffee before it was cool.
My friend wasn't open to the idea of me becoming a nudist.
I told him to stop being so clothes-minded.
Did you hear about the guy that went to a nudist colony? The first day was his hardest.
Why do emo kids cost so much?
Because theyβre the only people you can scan at the checkout machine.
What's the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid?
One has a functioning neck.
Memes
What do you call an emo with no breasts? A cutting board.
How many Emos does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None. They all just sit in the dark and cry.
Emo girls are bad, but what's worse? Cutting yourself.
There is gonna be a huge party at the orphanage tonight because the parents ain't home.
How do emos like their meat cooked?
Medium rawr.
I used to be a man trapped in a womanβs body. But then I was born.
What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?
Tic-tac-toe.
What do emo boys and emo girls have in common? They both wanna die and cut so they can die faster, but they are already dead, already dead to me!
Whatβs a Cannibalβs Favorite Food?
Ra-men.
What do you call a stoner when horny?
A weed whacker!
What's a cannibal's favorite place?
A day care.
Why do orphans like emos?
Reverse "emo" and put an "h" in the beginning.
For an orphan, any bag of chips is family size.
Imagine being emo.
Couldn't be me.
Why don't the Amish water ski?
The horses would drown.