Life jokes
Hi, I like food.
Orphan: "I get all the A pluses and y'all bad!"
And then I told him: "If you feel so special, try telling your parents. You can't, can you?"
If you had a friend like me, would you kill me?
Life is like a box of chocolates, mostly disappointing.
What happened when the emo kid gave the tree a high five? It left him hanging.
Monster: “I will devour your family.”
Orphan: “Oh.”
Q: Why are orphans so scared to get married?
A: They don't know what it feels like to have a family.
My sex life.
What does a kid with cancer and a house fly have in common? A life expectancy of 15-25 days.
Me: *finds out my dad's an orphan*
No one:
Literally no one:
Me: Time to make his life hell.😈
What's the difference between me and a corpse? I mean, I'm not dead... yet, right?
Joke: Tori’s boyfriend's life 😂😂
The most confusing day of my life was when I found out my toaster was waterproof.
What's the difference between an orphan and a flower?
The flowers actually get picked.
You went the wrong way. Always choose the right path.
Life isn't about pleasing yourself and that you have to do things for the sole benefit of God.
It’s like masturbation. Sometimes it’s not getting yourself off, but getting someone else off too. That’s what thighjobs are for.
I'll unplug your life support for my phone that's about to die.
*Son comes out as gay*
Me: What's 17 more years?
Want to hear a joke? I swear it isn't about my life again.
My mom and dad made a joke together and called it "yeetsu" (me)!
Gwen, I am not gay. There is some stupid faker online! I swear on my life that I am not!
Btw, if I was gay, then why am I chatting and dating a girl?