Legs jokes

Your mama so fat, when she put a leg in the car, the wheels deflated.

A sister told her brother to walk to the store, buy some candy, and watch a movie with her while eating the candy.

But he couldn't walk because he has no legs. He couldn't buy candy because he has no arms. He couldn't watch a movie because he was blind, and he couldn't eat because he has no stomach. Who said he was real?

A father awaits the birth of his first child.

The obstetrician says, "Unfortunately, he has no arms."

The father says, "I'll love it all the same."

But the obstetrician adds, "It is also without legs, trunk, head."

The father says, "I'll love it all the same."

Then the obstetrician confessed to him, "I'm sorry, but only this ear was born."

The father says, "I'll love it all the same."

And the obstetrician says, "Talk to him closer: he's deaf!"

Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms or legs.

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

Knock knock.....Who’s there... Not the little boy.

What has 2 arms, 2 legs, 2 eyes, 2 breasts for milking, and a hole to fill with my 9 inches?

A sexy female.

If I had a sister with only 1 leg... wouldn't her name be I-Lean?

What has 8 legs and 2 ears? A dog.

What do you call an octopus with eight legs? An octo-pussy!

When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.

Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!

Yo mama is so stupid, she took her dog to the vet because she thought he had a tube of lipstick stuck between his legs.

What do you say to a girl with no arms and no legs? Nice boobs!

Just shit my pants and it ran all down my legs... last time I eat at Popeyes.

Santa Claus gave a child a bike and a football. The child wasn’t happy. Why?

He had no legs.

Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up?

Because if they slept with both legs up, they would fall over!

Have you ever heard of the stupid coyote? He got stuck in a trap, chewed off three of his legs, and was still stuck!

What should you name a dog without any legs?

It doesn't really matter. No matter what you yell, he's not coming.

I put my leg up in the air sometimes, singing ayo, I'm a flamingo...

What's got 4 legs and is stronger than Superman?

Christopher Reeve's horse.

What do you call a cat with two legs instead of four?

Dead and without use, that's what I feel like.

A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."