Legs

Legs jokes

Leg day

When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.

Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!

Mama

Yo mama is so stupid, she took her dog to the vet because she thought he had a tube of lipstick stuck between his legs.

Boob

What do you say to a girl with no arms and no legs? Nice boobs!

Coyote

Have you ever heard of the stupid coyote? He got stuck in a trap, chewed off three of his legs, and was still stuck!

Pants

Just shit my pants and it ran all down my legs... last time I eat at Popeyes.

Santa Claus

Santa Claus gave a child a bike and a football. The child wasn’t happy. Why?

He had no legs.

Flamingo

Why do flamingos sleep with one leg up?

Because if they slept with both legs up, they would fall over!

Dog

What should you name a dog without any legs?

It doesn't really matter. No matter what you yell, he's not coming.

Horse

What's got 4 legs and is stronger than Superman?

Christopher Reeve's horse.

Orphan

A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."

Cat

What do you call a cat with two legs instead of four?

Dead and without use, that's what I feel like.

Orphan

Why did the Orphan punch the other orphan?

Because the orphan broke his leg then had to get a retirement fund, so then he farted and got 1m dollars in cash, so then he started eating his toe jam and thought it tasted really good, so he started selling it to Taco Bell, then ate a cow. All the sudden he was attacked by hangry aliens then gave them some toe jam. They loved it, so they farted there way back up to space where they were eating Harold's fresh toe jam. It was so good, then one of the aliens ate there dog, so had to go the dollar tree to get it out then started gagging on one of the aliens' 2 meter defeater, and then the Orphan made out with the other Orphan and had a wedding at playground sharting happily ever after.

Son

What do you call a Chinese person with 1 leg? Tie Son Whu.

Height

You're so short that I had to ask God why he made you short-ass toothpick legs.