There was a man. He took a right. He took another right. He took a last right. Why did he stop?
I'll remember my last words... "Sorry, I'm not sorry!"
That's the last time we park the TARDIS outside the portaloos at Glastonbury!
I really like those "driverless cars." I saw loads of them last week in the car park.
When is the last time you picked up the phone?
My bro had siblings who survived they could have helped him at any moment and now we have people around with the last name Hitler.
I’m still wearing the smile you gave me last week :)
Parent: Have you seen your sister?
Son: No, the last time I saw her was when we were playing hide and seek.
Friend: Hey, did you catch that game last night? I did, it was so good! After that I went to Kane’s, because Kane's is amazing! What did you do this weekend? I did-
Me: Dude, are you the Terms and Conditions? Because I don’t give a fuck about what you say.
When I got to you and I was android and we were all in Minecraft for the last two years and we had the same problem UI with you anymore but you can see it on Instagram that it is not a real time thing or a android.
I will remember my auntie's last words: "If you shoot me, your p-nis is small!"
(gun shot)
They say if Viagra lasts more than four hours, call the doctor? I’m just wondering, it’s been six hours and I’m still hard, should I call the doctor or hop on another woman?
What do children with cancer and Russian soldiers have in common? Their life doesn't last long.
I looked at your hairline, and when I saw you, I thought to myself of the last time I was a baby.
My grandma just died from cancer.
My last words to her were “I like your cut, G.”
I was going to make alligator last night, but I noticed that I only had a crock pot.😅
I ate Taco Bell last night. I pooped out your hairline.
The last thing the victims were thinking was, "Is there 9 or 11 stories?"
Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.
If you take off the first and last letter of "demon," they're gonna turn emo.
My uncle died on 9/11. Her last words were "Allahu Akbar."
