Knock

Knock jokes

Mom

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Your mom.

Your mom who?

O shit, my mom's home! Honey, get the f*** out of my house!

Pedophile

Why did the child cross the road?

To get to the church.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

The Priest... Let's go to my office, because I'm totally not a pedophile.

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  • Suzy

    Why did Suzy fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

    Knock knock. Who’s there? Not Suzy.

    Mama

    Yo mama's so poor, I knocked on the front door of her house and realized I was already outside in her backyard!

    Punch

    What's the only punch that can knock out a 21 year old?

    A Sandy Hook.

    Cow

    Knock, knock.

    Who's there?

    Rabid cow.

    Rabid cow who?

    Hold on, I need to get my gun....

    Tower

    What did Osama say after knocking over the Twin Towers?

    He he he haw.

    Life

    Friend: Knock knock.

    Me: Who's there?

    Friend: Your life.

    Me: Ahhh, I wish!

    *jumps off building*

    Preacher

    An LDS preacher knocks on the door with a chalice of wine offering to do the sacrament.

    The person living there points and says, "Begone, foul blood-drinker!"

    And promptly the preacher bursts into flames, leaving nothing but ash.

    Ice Cream

    My bf: Knock knock.

    Me: Who's there?

    My bf: Ice cream.

    Me: Ice cream who?

    My bf: I scream if you don't let me see that smoking hot body!

    Dishwasher

    Knock knock!!

    Who's there??

    Dishwasher!!

    Dishwasher who??

    Dishwasher way i used to talk when i got my head kicked in!

    Football

    Knock, knock. Who’s there? Uriah. Uriah who? Keep Uriah on the ball, Laquon Treadwell!

    Boo

    "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Boo." "Boo who?" "Don't cry in front of me, or else I'll cry!"