Knock jokes
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Johnny.
Johnny who?
Johnny want yo' mommy.
Your forehead is so big, if you fell, you would knock out your whole state cold.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce in.
Lettuce in who?
Lettuce in, it's cold out here!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Water.
Water who?
Water you waiting for, just let me in!
Knock knock. Who's there? Beep boop S.t.e.p.h.e.n beep boop H.a.w.k.i.n.g.
Remember kids, when you're angry, burn down an orphanage. Then they'll really be living the hard knock life.
Why'd the chicken cross the road?
A: To get to the gay (guys/girls) house.
(Wait awhile) then ask “knock knock?” Other person says “Who’s there?”
A: The chicken.
Knock knock.
Who is there?
Mother.
Mother who?
Fuck off bichon, I'm your mother!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Crippling depression.
Crippling depression who--?
Me.
Knock knock... Who's there? It's Jesus, let me in... Why? I have to save you... From what? From what I'm gonna do to you if you don't let me in.
Knock knock. Who's there? Depression. Depression who? Depression you!
Girl: I've been an orphan since I was three.
Boy: Knock knock.
Girl: ...Who's there?
Boy: Not your parents!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Fishes.
Fishes who?
Fishes the police, come out with your hands up!
Bob has no arms.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
"It's not Bob."
Bully: I'm going to hurt you so bad.
You: Well... your IQ is the same amount of teeth I'm about to knock out, so... you're so dumb that you can't even do that.
And your IQ is 5.
Knock, knock?
Who's there?
This dumb Explain Bear who needs to get a life.
A Chinese man moves to the USA after 50 years of living in Shanghai.
He bought a home on a small piece of land.
The friendly American neighbor decides to go across and welcome the new guy.
He goes next door, but on his way up the driveway he sees the Chinese man running around his front yard, chasing about 10 hens.
Not wanting to interrupt these "Chinese customs", he decides to put the welcome on hold for the day.
Next day he decides to try again, but just as he is about to knock on the front door, he looks through the window and sees him urinate into a glass and then drink it.
Not wanting to interrupt another "Chinese custom", he decides to put the welcome on hold for yet another day.
A day later he decides to give it one last go, but on his way next door, he sees the neighbor leading a bull down the driveway and then put his left ear next to the bull's butt.
The American dude can't handle this, so he goes up to the Chinese man and says, "Jeez man, what the hell is it with your Chinese customs? I come over to welcome you to the neighborhood and see you running around the yard after hens. The next day you are pissing in a glass and drinking it, and then today you have your head so close to that bull's butt, it could just about shit on you."
The Chinese man is very taken back and says, "Sorry sir, you no understand, these no Chinese customs I am doing, these are American Customs."
"What do you mean," says the neighbor, "Those aren't American customs."
"Yes they are, man at travel agent tell me," replied the Chinese man. "He say to become true American, I must learn to chase chicks, get piss drunk, and listen to bull-shit!"
POV: Your dad is gone.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Not your dad. LMAO.
Man: Knock, knock...
Boy: Who's there?
Man: Bear...
Boy: Bear who?
Man: Bear bottom.
The twin towers are like water bottles.
It's all right if you knock them down as long as you pick up the mess.