Kids jokes
Samuel liked Batman when he was a kid.
He still is a kid.
Teacher: What's 55 flowers plus 67 flowers?
Kid: A garden?
Teacher: Did I tell you that you're adopted?
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw a wok down the stairs.
Why is the blind kid popular?
He can't see the middle fingers.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
Why?
To get to the gay kid's house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Popular kids: all girls are chopped. The popular kids:
What is the difference between a human and a tree and a house? Is for dinner today after school today after I have school 🏫 I have for kids dinner 🍴 was that I had dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night is what time it when we went and get the dog 🐶 night and dinner 🍴 night I love 💕 it is the one ☝️ I did not have time today.
What does a kid say to an orphan, "Where are your parents?"\n\n"I don’t have parents. Where are yours? Are you an orphan like me? I hope not!"
Kid: Why is Pluto a dwarf planet?
Kid 2: Why?
Kid: 'Cause it's as short as your dick.
I told my kids to smile with the monkeys in the open zoo.
They never got together at all.
One day I asked my mom where kids came from. She said the man who went to the milk store.
Five years later, he came back and left again.
How do blind kids get punished?
By moving the furniture around the house.
Kids in wheelchairs can't stand up for themselves if there's a bully.
I saw a kid on the curb. I said, "Where are your parents?" God, I love working at the orphanage!
Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.
He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.
What animal can jump the highest? The emo kids.
Remember kids, if you're in a big problem, yell SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEËEEEEEEEEĒEEEEĘEEEEEEEEESH!
So I gave a disabled kid hot wheels. I mean cars, no I gave him literal hot wheels!
Kid: Aye, Mum, I'mma do something Dad could never do.
Mum: And that is?
*Kid walks out.*
*Kid comes back in with milk.*
Mum: I'mma beat ya ass!
Dwarfism is a growing problem.
Kidding, that’s not funny. My friend died of dwarfism.
He jumped off a curb stone.
The emo kid asked the tree for a high five. The tree left them hanging.