A kid has an older brother that’s a very popular lifeguard. He sees all of the people that talk to his brother, but he’s fairly ignored. So one day he asks his brother why everyone likes him so much. His older brother says, “Well, all you gotta do is stick a potato in your pocket.” So the next day the boy goes back to the pool and he has a potato in his pocket, but everyone is avoiding him even more now. At the end of the day he goes up to his brother and asks why it didn’t work, and his brother says, “Dumbass, you were supposed to put it in the front!”
Kids Jokes
What's the difference between a Lambo and 200 children in my basement? One screams; the children don't.
I met another kid with Down syndrome the other day and attempted to talk to him. But my mom showed up and was asking me why I am talking to the mirror.
Q. Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
A. Because he got hit by a truck.
Kid: Dad, where are you going?
Dad: To get milk.
TEN YEARS LATER
Kid's friend: Where's your dad?
Kid: He went to get milk but never came back.
I'm going to open a wellness center for ASD kids to be able to express themselves through music and painting. I will call it Artism!
If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.
I got detention for giving an emo kid a glow stick... I tried to lighten his spirit.
Kid: *runs down the street* HELP ME!
Officer: You OK, kid?
Me: Don't worry! He's my nephew, there was a big spider.
Officer: Oh, OK, ma'am. *walks off*
When officer leaves:
Me: *gets whip* What did I say about leaving the basement?
A kid named Timmy said to his dad that he had sex with his teacher, and his dad was proud of him and gave him a bike.
The kid said, "I can't use it; my butt hurts!"
What do emo kids like to smoke?
"Marjuanakillmyself."
The wheelchair kid laughed at my test score, so I told him to stand up to the anthem.
I got sent to the principal's office after telling the kid in the wheelchair to do a wheelie.
How do you get a depressed kid out of a tree? You cut the rope.
I threw a lamp at a depressed kid and tried to brighten up his day.
I walked into an orphanage and a kid was crying. I asked him what was wrong and he said some kids were bullying him. I told him to go tell his parents.
Why can't orphans really play baseball?
Because when they do, all the other kids tell that joke that everyone has heard more than 50 times.
I asked a emo kid if they wanna hang out.
I threw a lamp at a depressed kid. I was just trying to brighten up his day.
Why was the kid's report card all wet?
Because it was below "sea" level.
