Kids jokes
I ran into a kid today. Now I'm in jail and I lost my driver's license.
What do Kurt Cobain and an emo kid have in common?
They both smell like "Teen Spirit."
Are you a school? Cause I wanna shoot some kids inside of you.
Uder the sheets.
Under the sheeeets. Me and your mother making your brother.
Under the sheets. Do do do do dododoodoooddododoodo.
SEX KIDS FUCKING VIRGINS
When a cat gets a sibling, do they say, "Oh, shit! Another mew kid?!?!?!"
Put a kid in a wheelchair in the Twin Towers. Damn, I love Hot Wheels!
Mom: (Looking through Facebook) How adorable!
Kid: (Looking over her shoulder) What a cute ass!
The kid's mom blushes until she realizes what he was pointing to. It was a picture of a baby donkey.
The real question is, what was she looking at on the same screen that made her blush at that remark?
I gave the blind kid a gun and called it a hair dryer.
How many emo kids does it take to screw in a bulb?
None, because they all cry in the dark.
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and called it "Hot Wheels."
What do an X-Box and Michael Jackson have in common? They're both made of plastic and little kids turn them on.
What's the difference between an emo kid and an onion?
You cry when you cut an onion.
Why do emo kids not jump?
They're still in the sky.
Q: What makes depressed kids jump?
A: Bridges.
We are all just suicidal kids telling other kids not to do it.
One day, a man visited an orphanage.
Then he sees a kid crying. The man asked, "Where are your parents?"
The kid cries even harder.
Why is that kid walking like that? Oh, he's an alter boy.
Kid: Dad, I want Santa to give me an iPhone.
Indian poor dad: Son, Santa is deaf.
Kid: No, he is not. I saw him on TV yesterday.
Indian poor dad: Oh, actually, I asked him for a new wife. Maybe he is wearing AirPods.
Kid: You are my Santa, daddy.
Indian poor dad: Pull down your pants, son.
Kid: It's not an Apple product.
Indian poor dad: It's a banana.
I have big balls, said the kid holding two soccer balls.
How do pedophiles get kids to suck their d**k?
They spray paint it like candy 🍬.