Kids jokes
There was an animal on my porch, then I shot it in the head. It was strange that it had coffee in its hand. I flipped it over, and it was an animal, but it looked a lot like my kid.
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
Kid: Wanna hear a joke?
Me: Sure.
Kid: Why diddncjcjcbfjcbcjdbbskzmzj b b j no?
Me:?
I thought that kid was walking cool when I had my ears shut. It turns out he was moaning.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
What do you call an annoying emo kid? A nuisance.
Holy shit there's so many yo mama jokes. Here's mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop.
Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the Twin Towers.
Yo mama so old that she has Jesus's autograph.
Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her.
Yo mama so dumb that she thought Rocket League was a competition between kids in wheelchairs.
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
What's Jeffrey Epstein's favourite vegetable?
The retarded kid down the street.
Why are autistic kids a stupid, brainless, special freak?
Dark humor is like cancer; it's funnier when kids get it.
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
Me running after slapping the emo kid's wrist and saying, "I like ya cut g."
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree?
don't leave me hanging.
I went to go hang out with the emo kids, but they already did.
What does a roller coaster and Michael Jackson have in common?
Kids ride for free.
A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."
The other sibling said, "You are, too."
Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."
And the sibling says, "We're twins."
The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Special forces.
My brother eats water from the pig factory at 1:00 a.m., and blames a deaf kid, so he ended up going to solitary.