Kids jokes
I gave a blind kid a gun and said it was a blow dryer.
A leaf and an emo kid fall from a tree. Which one is gonna land first?
The leaf, because the rope stops the emo kid.
What kind of punch do little kids give to other little kids? The Sandy Hook.
To teach kids about democracy, I let them vote on dinner. They picked tacos. Then I made pizza because they do not live in a swing state.
Son to mother: "Mom, all the kids in the school are making fun of me because I am still a virgin."
Mother: "Well, start giving them bad grades, and they will stop."
When the quiet kid finally crashes out
POV: The quiet kid starts playing "Pumped Up Kicks" in the parking lot before school.
:me😐
Adopted kid: I made a big mistake!
Dad: You are one.
Teacher: What do you want when you grow up?
That depressed kid in class: Dead.
I was at a funeral for some kids in a school shooting. I don’t understand why everyone was so sad, so I asked a lady, "what’s so sad?" and she said, "What do you think was running through these kid’s head before they died?" I replied, "probably a bullet." She gasped and said, "do you have any idea how insensitive that is? What do you think is running through their parent’s heads?" I said "probably all the money they're losing from this funeral."
What did one emo kid say to the other? "Nice cuts, G!" (because they like to cut themselves).
What do you think would fall to the ground first, an emo kid or a leaf?
The leaf. The rope would stop the emo kid.
Why can’t a kid with ADHD shoot a gun?
Because their focus is way off.
August 2020: LeafyIsHere gets terminated on Youtube for harassing Pokimane.
Billy, a toxic kid in Leafy's fanbase: "Imane's life is a joke, that's why I call her Jokeimane."
A person who simps for Pokimane: "And you look like you came from a farm, Hillbilly."
How are boobs and toys similar?
Both were originally made for kids, but dads usually end up playing with them.
What do you call a kid who sings well?
Melodic Minor.
Why can't depressed kids high five a tree? It will leave them hanging.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home!
A serial killer was at my house and killed all my family but me. Why? I was in the living room.
What do sloths and depressed people have in common? They both hang off trees.
What is a group of depressed kids called? The suicide squad.
The emo kid went to give a tree a high five.
The tree left him hanging.
Why couldn't the kid with Down syndrome play football?
Because he got all the downs.
Using pi, distract the fat kid next to you so you can copy his answers.
Mom: They say our kid neighbor has blue blood.
Son: Really?
Also 2 hours later:
Son: Mom, the kid doesn't have blue blood.
Mom: Son, I-