Kids jokes
I went to jail because I gave the orphan kid a calendar with 363 days.
(I deleted Mother's Day and Father's Day.)
What did the blind kid get for his birthday?
I don't know, he still didn't look.
Why did the homeless man stop to help the kids cross the street?
To get them into his van.
The gay kid tried to shoot up the school, but his shots would not go straight.
Why did the kid with Down syndrome get expelled?
He was always tardy.
What do grapes 🍇 love most about family?
Raisin kids!
You can understand depression if you are still in school and get bullied by bullies, punished by teachers, and scolded by parents for being that quiet kid who says nothing.
What do you call a group of sped kids with AK-47s?
Special forces.
Why is Biden a priest?
So kids call him father.
Dark humor is like kids with cancer; they never get old.
A normal kid brings an MP3 to school.
A rich kid brings an MP4 to school.
A quiet kid brings an MP5.
Kids make a lot of plans for people who can't drive anywhere.
"Everyone knows I love kids better than people."
- Joe Biden. (A.K.A. Pedo Peter.)
Hear the one about the deaf kid?
He didn't.
Kid 1: Guys, stop making 9/11 jokes. My dad died in 9/11.
Kid 2: Sorry, I didn't know.
Kid 1: He was the best fighter pilot in all of Saudi Arabia.
What's the difference between an apple tree and an orphan? The apples get picked.
What does a blind kid and an orphan have in common?
They can’t see their parents.
Teacher makes 1 kid recite the ABCs and the other count to 10.
Teacher: You can kill 2 birds with 1 stone.
Little Johnny goes home and throws a rock at two birds. One dies. He gives his dad a concussion from the rock hitting his head.
Johnny at school: You can kill a bird and give a man a concussion.
What do I call a white person with 15 black kids?
Coach.
I walk up to a kid. I ask where his parents are, and he started crying. Then I walked out of the orphanage.