Kids jokes

How many emo kids does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, they all sit in the dark and cry.

When the school shooter is about to leave the room, then the autistic kid says, "Goodbye!"

Down syndrome kid: Stop being greedy with the Legos! Me: Stop being greedy with the chromosomes!

There's a kid named Little Johnny who would always cuss. Well, one day, he was sitting in class and the teacher said, "Let's play a game." So the game was she calls out a letter and someone raises her hand and tells her a word that begins with that letter. The teacher says "A". Little Johnny raises his hand and the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, he might say something like a**." So the teacher calls on Sally. Sally says "apple". The teacher says "B". Little Johnny raises his hand. The teacher thought, "No, he might say something like b!tch." So the teacher goes all the way to R. The teacher says "R". Little Johnny raises his hand and says, "Me, me, please, I really know one." Then the teacher thinks to herself, "Well, there's no cuss word that starts with R," so she said, "Okay, Johnny, give me a word that starts with R." Little Johnny says, "A rat!" and the teacher, very pleased, says, "Very good, Johnny. What type of rat?" Little Johnny says, "A big gosh damn mother freaker."

Sorry, I had to edit some word, but y'all know what I meant.

My friend's mother thought a kid who had autism and Down syndrome called him a "double down."

One day, the fat kid came up to me and asked me, "What's cracking?" The floorboards, you idiot. You're causing a 9.7 Richter scale earthquake and asking ME what's cracking. It would be best if you looked down for a second.

I was at work yesterday and I saw this kid crying. I went up to him and asked him where his parents were, and he started to cry even more. Gosh, don't you just love working at the orphanage?

My jokes are like kids with cancer; they never get old.

What do you call a group of depressed kids?

The suicide squad.

How do Asians name their kids?

They throw pots and pans down the stairs. (ching chong dong)

I saw this kid on the street wearing a rag. I said, "Are you an orphan?" He said, "What gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."

What do you call an annoying emo kid? A nuisance.

You've probably heard this one before, but screw it.

What's the difference between Jesus Christ and the kid I just killed?

Jesus Christ probably died a virgin.

I got a detention because I told an emo kid to "hang in there."

What does an Xbox/PlayStation and Michael Jackson have in common?

Kids turn them on.

Why did the emo kid hate the nun? (Cuz nun of them were emo.)

Why don't Asian kids believe in Santa Claus?

Because they're the ones who made the toys.

What's the difference between oxygen and children? I don't have oxygen in my basement.

When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄

What did they do with Michael Jackson when he died?

They melted him down and turned him into Lego, so kids could play with him for once.