Kids jokes

What do emo kids and Hitler have in common?

There's gonna be more brains on the wall when they lose something.

How do you get Wacko Jacko to come inside your shop? Have little boys' pants half off!

What did the rope and the tree say to the kid?

Do you want to hang later?

An emo kid walked to me holding a rope, and asked: "Do you want to join my family tree?"

I went to the principal's office because I gave a deaf kid ear pods for his birthday.

What do you call a gang of emo kids?

Suicide Squad.

Why can't two Chinese people have a white kid?

Two wongs don't make a white.

When the school shooter knocks on the classroom door, and the autistic kid opens it.

An orphan is like marriage. The kid is always the reason for divorce. The kid is always the reason for his parents leaving him.

There was a kid named Buttitches, and his teacher was taking attendance. Then the teacher asked, "What is your name?" And he answered, "Buttitches." Then the teacher asked again, "What's your name?" and he replied, "Buttitches." Then a student yelled out, "JUST SCRATCH YOUR ASS ALREADY!"

What's in common with Michael Jackson and a phone?

Kids play with both of them.

So, a woman gives birth to a child, and the doctor grabs it by the leg and holds it upside down. Then, he starts swinging it around the room, slamming it into the furniture. The mother tries to get up and starts screaming and crying, “Let my baby go, you sick bastard!” The doctor looks at the mother and stops swinging the baby. He is holding it by the left leg and starts chuckling, “I’m just kidding, it was already dead.”

How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?

You give them a Sandy Hook.

"So I asked a genie if he could grant me this wish. I wished to be like Michael Jackson. The next day, I was in a playground full of little kids."

what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub?

steamed vegetables.

When the school shooter finally leaves your classroom, but then the autistic kid next to you's sketchers light up.

A starving homeless kid asks me for food.

I said, "sorry, my plate is full."

What is the similarity between a sloth and a depressed kid?

They both hang from trees.

I saw a kid crying and I asked him where his parents were...

Man, I love working at an orphanage.

What did the make-a-wish kid say to the staff? "I don't wanna go to Disneyland, I wanna live longer."