Kids jokes
What did one depressed kid say to the other?
Hey, wanna hang together?
If you were driving when all of a sudden a young kid and an old man run right in front of you, what do you hit?
The brakes, you sick bastard.
If a homeschooled kid kills his parents, is it considered a school shooting?
My teacher: If you could go anywhere, where would you go?
Me: Demon Slayer.
My teacher: Why?
The quiet kid: TO GET EATEN BY A DEMON OR BECOME ONE!!!
What has eight legs and leaves kids alone? The Jackson 4.
A few kids were talking about how big their houses were. Kids were pointing to huge houses and huge apartments. One little boy said, "Bet I have the biggest home." To everyone's surprise, he pointed right towards the massive orphanage.
Knock knock. Who's there? A boy. A boy who? A boy who can't reach the doorbell knocking at your door.
What’s a depressed kid's favorite game? Hangman.
That poor kid, he was fine until I bought him a mother's day card for his mum. The second he saw it, he burst out crying...
What do Kurt Cobain and an emo kid have in common?
They both smell like "Teen Spirit."
what did the suicidal kid say to the tree?
don't leave me hanging.
When the quiet kid has an argument with the school shooter, and you didn't get to pull out the AK.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair coming out of a building on fire? Hot wheels.
I was reading the news and read that a kid killed his family, and when they interviewed him, he said he wanted to become Batman.
I went to go hang out with the emo kids, but they already did.
An American bully goes up to an English kid and says, "You're ugly!"
And the English kid says, "Well, wanna know why you can't play Jenga?"
"Why?" says the bully.
"Because you haven't got a tower."
Mother, “Johnny, if you keep being this naughty, you’ll get kids who will be very naughty to you!”
Johnny, “Oh mom, you just betrayed yourself there, didn’t you?”
My little cousin's birthday was in a few days, and his mom said he wanted Hot Wheels. So I sent him a video of me pushing a paralyzed kid into fire and screaming "HOT WHEELS!"
A guy is on trial for leading a mob to gang rape a woman he'd taken out for a date. His defense is that he was helping her live out a fantasy.
The DA is furious and asks him WTF gave him that idea. He said, "After the date I took her back to her house, pulled out my dick, and tried to hand it to her. She told me, 'You've gotta be fucking kidding me. Seriously, go get some help!'"
An orphan, an emo, and an apple are on a tree. The apples get picked unlike the orphan, while the emo kid is already dead from hanging.