Kids jokes
I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.
He never came back the next day, says the local news.
I threw a kid in a wheelchair into a fire... I called him hot wheels.
What did one emo kid say to the other? "Nice guts, G!"
There was a kid in my class who said my face looked like a physical reaction (we were learning about that stuff at the time), so I said I made a chemical reaction with his mom last night.
I gave an emo kid money.
He gave me the great depression.
It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.
What do you call a gay kid on fire?
Knock knock. Who's there? Colin! Colin who? Colonisation!
Just kidding, colonisers don't knock before they come in.
What is the difference between a tall kid and an orphan? One is tall enough that their parents can see them.
Some kid: Hey, did you know there's an orphanage down the street?!
Me: NO WAY! Wanna check it out?
Kid: NO, IT'S HAUNTED!!
Me: Haunted my ass, let's go!
Kid: Wait, isn't your house also haunted???
Me: Yea
Kid 1: Do you know Candace?
Kid 2: Candace who?
Kid 1: Candace dick fit in your mouth!
Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.
The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.
Kid finds genie lamp, wishes to be Batman.
Genie: You're now an orphan.
I saw a little kid cry. I went up to him and asked where his parents were. Jeez, I love working at the orphanage!
Some weird kid came into school today with his tagging gun. He tagged my friend really good. At the end, he tagged 12 students and 1 teacher. VICTORY ROAYAL ✌
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
My name is Devonair.
When I get a haircut, it's always bald.
Kids make fun of me, they call me "dang-near bald head."
My name is Devonair *dev-on-near*
I always thought they were making fun of me because of my name pronounced near.
As a kid, I was made to walk the plank.
Because we couldn't afford a dog.
When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be.
Turns out, I'm just a burden.
"Addison, are you one of those kids who are very, very, very, very smart? Because you sound like one."