Kids jokes
Kid: I want to be like Batman.
Genie: I can make arrangements. The kid comes home, both of his parents are dead.
Genie: I told you.
Kid: .............................................
What do you get when you cross an adopted kid with a river?
Moses hits the adoption lottery!
Why was the orphan kid bad at school? Because he wanted a phone call home.
What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?
Kids won't eat the broccoli.
Remember kids, ejaculate, then evacuate.
Where do religious kids practice sports?
In the prayground.
Alle kinder hedder Rune, undtagen Kurt, han hedder Rune.
All the kids are named Rune, except Kurt, he is named Rune.
What did the tree say to the kid with a bike? "Take a hike!"
Ooh, I wonder what's on this browser. *clicks* "How to tell your kid they're adopted."
A sibling went up to their other sibling and said, "Dad said you're adopted."
The other sibling said, "You are, too."
Then the first sibling goes, "No, I'm not."
And the sibling says, "We're twins."
The other kid goes, "And you're adopted... oh."
Kid: Hey, Dad.
Dad: You're an hour late.
Kid: No, it was two hours. Also, I was working on math.
Dad: By yourself?
Kid: No.
Dad: A boy?
Kid: I was with the teacher.
Miss Stephen likes kids like she likes wine: 15 years and in isolation.
Kid: How much do you get paid?
Teacher: Minimum wage.
How do Chinese people name their kids?
They throw a wok down the stairs.
The Emo kid was late to his flight, so he needed to cut to the chase.
What does the dumb kid say to the blind kid?
"Long time no see!"
I know everything about Walt Disney! How he died, how his mom and dad died, how his kids died, when he was born, where he was born, and how he was born. 😏
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
D.A.R.E. Lion Mascot: Don't take drugs kids!
Me: My therapist says I need those to live.
D.A.R.E. Lion Mascot: _escorts to school counselor_
I don't see why people say that emo kids don't like to hangout.
I saw them hanging all day.