What is a group of emo kids called?
A suicide squad.
Kids Jokes
I bet you're a child molester who got out of jail and is now sexually harassing kids such as Addison! Will fuck off and get a life, btw your roasts are not fucking funny, they're bullshit like your face and your hairline.
Teacher: What is a cow?
Kid: Meat.
Teacher: Nice. What is a chicken?
Kid: Eggs.
Teacher: What does the big fat pig give you?
Kid: Homework.
Me: punching a kid.
My FBI agent: You're adopted.
A kid in the back of the class just yelled “Jenga!”
The class was watching a 9/11 documentary.
At weddings, old people tell kids, "You're next!"
At funerals, little kids tell old people, "You're next!"
Make a wish kid: I want to meet Mac Miller.
Make a wish staff: You will soon, chief.
A kid and his dad went to the park. The kid accidentally steps on a cockroach.
They go home immediately and dad gets the scissors. Now the kid has some balls to play with.
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
What's the best thing about being a pedophile? You can choose the fit profession where you find kids most.
What's the difference Michael Jackson and a play station have in common...
They're both plastic and kids turn them on.
Why is Michael Jackson on the naughty list this year?
Because he sexually kids 😂
A girl was going through some really bad health issues at her house. It got so bad that she had to be rushed to the hospital.
Her husband found out about this after work and went to check on her. When he got there, the desk lady immediately pointed down the hall to a doctor. The guy walked up to the doctor, "Are you the one taking care of my wife?" The doctor glanced away from his papers, "Yes, that would be me, but I am afraid that she is in very bad condition. I have bad news and good news. The bad news is that she will have to be wheeled around in a wheelchair. Also, she can't eat normally. Taking care of her will become very hard. Basically, it will be like taking care of a big baby." Shocked, the guy says, "Wait, if that's the bad news, than what is the good news?" The doctor goes, "I'm just kidding with you, she died!"
We wrote letters to a kid with cancer.
My letter read, "It's a bumpy road, but soon you will have a straight path."
People didn't realize it was meant for his heart monitor. Lol.
What did they do with his body when he died?
They made him into Lego so kids can play with him for once.
I can't imagine him moaning with the kids, "Hi, uh, ya daddy, uh HEE!"
What do you call a kid that's in the fire? Hot Wheels.
Why do orphans hate smart kids?
Because the smart kids get their parents' attention.
This kid yelled "Jenga" when we were watching a 9/11 documentary.
When the school shooter makes the emo kid hang himself and the autistic kid thinks it's a piñata: 🤪🏏
