Kids jokes
Why does a deaf kid always like football? He gets signed.
The kid's dad was a magician because he disappeared and never came back.
Why do so many kids love boomerangs? Because they always come back.
Why do some kids have water with their cereal?
Because their dad never came back with the milk.
What do you call an autistic kid with a gun?
Answer: Special forces.
What's the difference between child abuse and abandonment?
The abused ones are forced to listen while being abused, while abandoned kids cry because they don't have parents anymore.
What do blind kids and orphans have in common?
They can't see their parents.
Why didn’t the grape 🍇 leave her family?
Because she loved raisin' kids!
Q: How do you knock out 26 kids in one punch?
A: You give them a Sandy Hook.
What's big and yellow...?
A bus full of kids.
Why did the kidnapper cross the road?
To get the kids at the playground.
What do pears and emo kids have in common?
They both be hanging.
Once I threw the ball at a wheelchair kid. Now we are playing Rocket League! :D
I saw a kid crying yesterday, so I asked him, "Where are your parents?"
Bad move, I got fired from my job at the Orphanage.
What did Osama Bin Laden's kids not inherit after his death?
His hide-and-seek skills.
College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.
What keeps an emo kid from hitting the ground?
The rope.
Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson & Neil Armstrong? A: Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon, and Michael Jackson f@ck$ little kids in the a$$!
I gave a deaf kid AirPods.
Why did the emo kid cross the road? To get a box of tissues!