Kids jokes

What did the emo say to the popular kid?

"Go fuck yourself for thinking all emos cut because they don't... y'know, for a matter of fact, fuck all you guys..."

What is the difference between a normal kid and an emo kid?

"I like ya cut G" means two different things.

So a mom went to her kid and said, "If you pray to God, He will give you your sight back." So he did exactly that.

The next morning, the mom heard a scream, so she went to the kid's room and asked, "What's wrong?" The kid replied, "It didn't work!" The mom said, "April Fools!"

Poles are as straight as adopted kids' parents.

Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?

Because he wanted to go to high school.

I can smell your kids!

Why have kids? Just go get one now, no nine-month delay.

Kid: "THERE'S A SHOOTER IN THE BUILDING!"

Shooter: "Oops."

Why are emo kids the best jumpers?

Because they never fall down.

One man said, "The audacity on that deaf kid!"

The other man said, "Bro, does he even have audio?"

What do you call an autistic kid with a gun? Special forces.

I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire and said, "Hot Wheels!"

What is the difference between Superman and an emo kid? Superman can actually land.

Put a kid in a wheelchair in the Twin Towers. Damn, I love Hot Wheels!

How do Chinese people name their kids?

They throw pots and pans down the stairs.

I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into a fire.

Now we call him hot wheels.

Can emo kids get a happy birthday?

The guy called up to the orphanage, then he asked, "Where are the kids' faces?"

Then another guy said, "Sorry, there's no homepage."

I was at the orphan place, and I saw a kid crying. And I asked him where his parents are, and he fainted.

"Rape isn't a joke unless you watch YouTube Kids."