This guy in a trench coat walks up to a kid, opens the trench coat and has glasses inside. He says to the kid, “Hey kid, want some extra-see”
What’s the difference between a pimple and a Priest? You see, a pimple wouldn’t normally come on a kid’s until he’s 13 years old.
When the school shooter kills the teacher and the autistic kid declares communism
what did the pedophile say to the kid. “roses are red ,my name is dan ,i have a gun get in the van”
The Coach of the Detroit Lions had put together the perfect football team. But then his quarterback got blindsided and was out for the season with a knee injury.
Then his backup went down with a concussion. He tried the trading route, free agents, but nobody any good was available.
One evening while watching the news from Iraq, he saw a young Iraqi soldier with an amazing arm. The soldier rifled a grenade on a perfect arc into a 4th story window from 100 yards, bam!
He tossed another directly into a tight group of 12 enemy fighters 80 yards away, ka-bam! Then a humvee passed, going 60 kph, boom! Another perfect shot!
Coach said to himself, “I got to have this guy. He’s got the best arm I’ve ever seen!”
He tracks him down and convinces him to come to Detroit. The kid takes coaching perfectly, makes all the plays, and long story short, the Lions win the Super Bowl.
The Iraqi is now the Conquering Hero in pro football, and a huge story. But when the broadcast team tries to interview him, all he wants is to phone his mom.
“Mother,” he yells over the phone, “We just won the Super Bowl!”
“Don’t talk to me,” the woman says. “You abandoned us. You can’t be my son.”
The young Iraqi begs, “Mom, you don’t understand! Our team won the biggest game here in the U.S. Thousands of fans are screaming for me. The U.S. President is going to call me!”
“I don’t care,” his mother snaps. “Right now I can hear gunshots everywhere. Our block is like a ruin. Your brothers were beaten half to death last night, and your sister was nearly raped.”
Then she says, "I can never forgive you for making us move to Detroit.
What do Catholic priests and school shooters have in common?
They both like to dump their loads into little kids.
Why do downs kids blend in in geometry.
Their foreheads are angled.
Dad: I get to touch animals every day at the zoo. KId: Why? Dad: I clean up animal s hit at a zoo.
Kid starts shooting people in school, teacher asks “why are you doing that”. He responds, “I wanted to paint the walls red for Christmas”
Dark jokes are like kids with cancer, They never get old
Why did the downs kid get expelled? He was always tardy
What does a kid and wine have in common?
Shit i forgot but they’re both locked in my cellar right now.
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone
He got ran over by a bus
A father is talking to his three kids Kid 1: why is my name rose Dad:Because when you were a kid a rose fell on your head Kid 2: why is my name lily Dad: Because a lily fell on your head when you were a baby Kid 3: Auughhghhhggghhh Dad:oh hey Brick
Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
Because he got hit by a bus!
Why did the kid bring a ladder to school? so he could get into high school
Do you know why I hate pedophiles?
They are fucking immature kids!
One day, I saw a kid beating up a fat kid. But a cop came out of nowhere and threw the bully of him. The cop then asked the bully, “Why are you beating him up?” I responded, saying "I fighting obesity; no children should suffer from diabetes and heart disease. Then, the cop pulled out a gun and fired, afterwards saying, “Well, how did I do?”
What is a name of a show for kids? Barney
*tibia honest, it takes a lot of spine to memorize all the bones in the skeletal system. i mean, there’s a skele-ton of em! you gotta be boned up for the skeletal system exam, buddy chum pal. now that was a humerus ribtickling skelepun. besides, if ya don’t know all of the bones in the skeletal system, get boned, fucking numbskull. did those tickle your funny bone? now i’ve been working down to the bone typing these puns, kid. now if you hate all these, i won’t be bothered, i got thick skin! but first, lemme take a skelfie in the skelevator playing my trom-bone. now, i gotta go to grillby’s. they got a discount on spare-ribs. bone-voyage, my homeslice breadslice dawg.