Kid jokes
Some kids at school made fun of me for playing Halo. I gave them a halo.
I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.
They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."
When you're the only one nice to the quiet kid.
Kid: "I like you... don't go to school tomorrow."
What is an emo kid's favorite Tool? A rope.
Why do dead babies cry? Just kidding, they are dead.
This mute kid was getting made fun of. I told him to speak up for himself.
What is the difference between Superman and an emo kid? Superman can actually land.
It's April Fools' Day. I'm gonna go to the orphanage and tell kids, "Their parents are here to pick them up."
I was cussing out this kid for stealing, and their mom walked in and said, "Hey, language!" I just said, "English, bitch!"
“Wanna smoke, kids?” is an offer to do drugs.
“Wanna smoke kids?” is an offer to kill.
It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.
"Look at these kids stealing ideas, bro. They're going to jail."
Knock, knock. Who's there? Fuck. Fuck who? What, are you kidding me? I just wanted to tell you a joke!
The quiet kid starts playing "Pumped Up Kicks" in the parking lot before school.
When the emo kid is about to hang himself in the school bathroom, and the autistic kid starts swinging the rope like Indiana Jones!
Name something you practiced kissing on as a kid.
Sister. SWEET HOME ALABAMA!
The humor of this generation of kids shouldn't be called 'brain rot'; it should be called 'brain rape.' I believe most people of this generation that aren't 5-year-olds could agree with me, but my mind and thoughts have been violated by the things that kids these days find funny and entertaining. #SKIBIDDI
Kid: Why do orphans like tennis?
Dad: Because it's the only time they get "love."
- All over it like a fat kid on a cupcake.
- Giggling like a room full of fat kids.
- Drinking 8 cups of water a day seems impossible, but 8 beers and 3 shots in 3 hours goes down like a fat kid on a seesaw.
How can you tell an anti-vaccine kid?
It's only got 10 hours to live.