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Shorty

    • Oooh, I fall apart. Oooh, yeah, mmhmm. She told me that I'm not enough, yeah, And she left me with a broken heart, yeah. She fooled me twice and it's all my fault, yeah. She cut too deep, now she left me scarred, yeah. Now there's too many thoughts goin' through my brain, yeah, And now I'm takin' these shots like it's Novocaine, yeah. Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Never caught a feelin' this hard Harder than the liquor I pour Tell me you don't want me no more But I can't let go Everybody told me so Feelin' like I sold my soul Devil in the form of a whore Devil in the form of a whore You said it No, you said it No, you said it We'd be together Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought Ice keep pourin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' Covered in scars and I can't help showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin' Ice keep droppin' and the drink keep flowin' Try to brush it off but it keep on goin' All these scars, can't help from showin' Whippin' in the foreign and the tears keep blowin', yeah Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, I fall apart Down to my core Oooh, didn't know it before Surprised when you caught me off guard All this damn jewelry I bought You was my shorty, I thought.

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    God

    • When God made Chinese, he said, "DON'T LOOK!" and the Chinese said, "Why?"

    And God replied, "You won't want to be fruitful and multiply if you saw where you are putting that thing."

    It turned out the Chinese are very obedient to God.

    When God made White Man, he said, "NEVER SHUT YOUR EYES!" and the white man said, "Why?"

    And God replied, "You need to keep an eye out for the Chinese, one day they will out number you."

    It turned out the Chinese are very obedient to God.

    Then the white man said, "There is a white genocide!"

    And the survivors of the Holocaust said, "All these Europeans killed each other, so a white genocide is accurate. White killed white."

    Then the Chinese said, "Thank you, we take your land now."

    And the Jews said, "But we are God's chosen people!"

    And the Chinese said, "Yes, every time God show up you get bullied! You might want to worship someone else!"

    And the Jews said, "Why are you Chinese so lucky, you can't even see, you blind!"

    And the Chinese said, "Jesus say be in the world not of the world, so don't go looky looky at the world then."

    It turned out the Chinese are very obedient to God.

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    • Waiter

    • The waiter comes and asks you for the check. Instead I give him a 20 dollar bill and say, "Boy, you can keep it!"

    Sock

    • What do 15-year-old boys and washing machines have in common?

    They both like keeping one sock for themselves.

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    • Mother

    • Bully: Shut up, motherfucker!

    Me: Well, stop talking to me and I won't have to keep fucking your mother.

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    • Core

    • To all those who say this is a joke, it isn't. It's a core of humor and magic. It's a part of humor we can keep. Like if you agree.

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