Joke jokes
A snake walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "How?"
Three years ago my doctor told me I was going deaf. I haven't heard from him since.
Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use a honeycomb.
Chuck Norris died, but Death was too afraid to tell him.
When Chuck Norris breaks a mirror, the mirror gets 7 years of bad luck.
Chuck Norris once went to hell.
After that, the Devil only falls asleep after he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
What did the cheese say to itself in the mirror?
"Halloumi, who's the tastiest of them all?"
Why did the man miss the funeral?
He wasn’t a mourning person.
"A priest, an imam, and a rabbit walk into a clinic to donate blood. The rabbit turns to the nurse and says, 'I think I'm a Type-O!'"
"What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One weighs a ton, and the other is a little lighter!"
"Did you hear about the guy who got the left side of his body amputated? He’s all right now."
I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.
My dog is a genius... I asked him what is two minus two, he said nothing.
What do you call a paralyzed kid with a gun?
Special Forces.
If you scanned my thigh, it would show up as a package of Oreos on the screen.
Give a man a plane ticket and he flies for the day.
Push him out of the plane at 3,000 feet and he'll fly for the rest of his life.
There's a Mexican, Brazilian, and Cuban in a S60. Who's driving?
What do you call a bald person on fire?
A fried egg.
What’s the difference between a mountain and your girl?
At least the mountain has two hills.
Your hairline be going up and down like a Formula 1 car!