Joke jokes
What do you call an orphan taking a family photo? A selfie.
You're so trash that when I dropped you off, I got a ticket for littering.
Why did the orphan go to church?
So that they had someone to call father.
A pun, a play on words, and a limerick walk into a bar.
No joke!
Have you heard about the smart traveler? He's clearly going places.
Stairs are bad, because they are always up to something.
Me: *looks at person's hand* This guy doesn't have fingers!
Random person with no fingers: Why do you have to point that out?
I heard an unusual word the other day: "Opaque."
Unfortunately, what it means is unclear.
What type of flour do orphans use to bake with...? Self-raising flour!
Knock knock. Who’s there? Gary. Gary who? Gary a torch.
This text does not contain a joke.
What did the Alabama graduate say to the Tennessee graduate?
"Welcome to McDonald's, may I take your order please?"
Why did the hipster burn his tongue?
He sipped his coffee before it was cool.
Why was the Burnside Bridge so hot?
Because it's on the burning side.
Why did the mummy leave his tomb after 3000 years?
Because he thought he was old enough to leave home.
That is one of the very, very, very, very, VERY WORST jokes ever.
Yes, you are the one who can get it, and what time do I have?
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.
What's red all over and spins at 100 mps?
Baby in a blender.
What is a mouse's favorite movie?
"Sharpay's Fabu-mouse Adventure!"
Do you know what my favorite time of day is?
6:30, hands down.