Joke

Joke jokes

Joker

Why is a deck of cards similar to a miniature pony?

They are both jokers.

Difference

What is the difference between a hundred dead babies and a Ferrari?

I don't have a Ferrari in my garage!

Chance

I’d make a joke to Fetty Wap on this, but there’s only a 50/50 chance he’ll SEE this.

Child

My wife and I have decided that we do not want children.

If anybody does, please send me your contact details and we can drop them off tomorrow.

Guy

What does a French guy say when he falls off?

Oh no, Eiffel!

Duck

Hello! Why did the duck cross the road? To prove he wasn't chicken!

Pepperoni

Why were the Twin Towers mad?

Because they ordered pepperoni and got plane. (Yes, it's "plain," shut.)

Nut

Did you eat Chef Boyardee's food?

No, why?

Boy are deez nuts so big.

Vegetable

My wife said she wanted steamed vegetables with her steak, so I put her father in the hot tub.

Reason

I'm not saying you're stupid.

But you're the reason plastic bags come with the warning, "Do not place over head!"