Joke jokes
Why does an emo wish they were a fish?
Because they're underwater.
What can’t a person with no arms do: if you're happy and you know it, clap your hands.
What do you call a group of emos about to jump off a bridge? Suicide Squad.
Why was the orphan stupid?
Because his parents couldn't guide him.
How do you find someone's hairline? It's simple, you don't.
Me: Hi Jacob!
Jacob: Hi.
Me: Your parents went to jail for littering when you were born!
Jacob: GOO GOO GAH GAH
What's Peter Pan's favorite place to eat out?
Wendy's?
Papyrus: Sans, I have a joke. What do you call someone lazy and incompetent?
Sans: What do you call them?
Papyrus: YOU! NOW GET UP AND CLEAN YOUR ROOM, YOU LAZY BONES!
What does a clock do when he's still hungry?
He goes back "four" seconds!
I bought the world's worst thesaurus yesterday. Not only is it terrible, it's terrible.
They said time heals all wounds, well, I broke your watch.
Knock, knock. Who's there? An armless person. Why? They got stumped on why they contacted you.
What hood do zombies come from?
Dead Ends.
What's better than eight kids in a dustbin?
One kid in eight dustbins.
What's the difference between me and an egg?
An egg gets laid.
Don't leave us hanging, Sayori.
A man went to the doctor, and the doctor said, "What happened to you?"
The man replied and said, "I broke my arm in two places!"
Then the doctor replied with, "DON’T GO BACK TO THOSE TWO PLACES!!"
What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Yesterday I went to a lightbulb party, and it was lit.