Joke jokes

A burger walks into a bar and says, "Hi sir, can I have a glass of water?"

And the waiter says, "I'm sorry sir, we don't serve food here."

What do you call a swimming terrorist? A bath bomb.

When my mom asks, "If your friend pays you to jump off a bridge, would you do it?" I say, "No, Mom... I'd do it for free!"

Why are skeletons not funny? Because they have no humor. 🤣

A guy walks to his friend's house. His friend says, "Where is your girlfriend?" The guy says, "Meet me at the cemetery in a week."

Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.

Are you a bullet? 'Cause you're stuck in my head.

I go to get my mail.

Stranger: "Something fell out of your pocket! April fools!"

Me: "You're adopted, April fools!"

Then I see an orphan behind me and gets all excited.

Why can't you make fun of a bunny's head?

Because they have a hare-line.

I remember last year all these bitches called me lame so I stopped the simping and pretended I was gay, now I think they're all fucking with me.

I'm an LGBTQ imposter got cut last year know I've made the roster and you may think I'm a monster. I'm just just tryna see some titties.

On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student, "What are your parent's names?"

The student replied, "My father's name is Laughing and my mother's name is Smiling."

The teacher said, "Are you kidding?"

The student said, "No, Kidding is my brother, I am Joking."

If you try to fail and you succeed, which one did you do?

I went to the store and bought Minecraft Java Edition.

I found a village, burned it down, and then I went home and played Minecraft.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Interrupting cow." "Interrupting cow wh-" "MOO!"

Why do depressed people want to kill themselves?

To be loved on the news show for 10 minutes.

What do you say when a person trips?

You say, "Why you trippin'?"

What did the orange say to the other orange?

I orange you glad!

Why was the sea sad? Because it was blue.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Ken.

Ken who?

Can you walk the dog for me?

What does an orphan call a family picture?

Answer: a selfie.